Its just me and you, Doobz

[TekDragon]

Man this place is silent. Like a tomb...

Im bored as fuk and there aint nothing going on in RL or in here :(

Friend told me hed stop by tonight with some herb but, knowing him, that could be anytime from 5 minutes from now to 2AM in the morning :(

*sigh*

What you up to man?

[TekDragon]

TekD aimlessly wanders the empty, silent, blue and black background halls of the damned...

"Helllooooooooooooooooo?"

slowly it dawns on him... there is evil down here. The shadows are too long, too dark. The silence is too thick. Some great evil has corrupted this forum and hidden itself. Only in the silence could it be detected.

"I know your there, Onizuka! I will destroy you!!"

[TekDragon]

Wandering aimlessly through the halls of the forum/crypt, TekD stumbles into a secret compartment hidden in the wall. Inside is a stash of shotgun shells, on top of which lies a double barreled shotgun.

"Wtf, im getting flashbacks from Doom II"

TekD loads the shotgun and stuffs as many shells as he can into his pockets. Whatever evil lurks down here, wherever it is... its about to get a serious dose of ass kicking.

[Doobz]

Haha, I just had the window up, I wasn't even really browsing.

Wow, you do like to type.

[Peacemaker]

Mean while on the outside world....

"What the hell is wrong with him???" said Peacemaker

Peacemaker waves his hands infront of TekD a lot, but TekD just sits there on his bench looking off into no where cluthing an invisible rifle of somekind.

[Doobz]

keep going i wanna hear the rest of the story :)

[TekDragon]

Outfitted with a shotgun, hoody, and sweats, TekD is ready to kick some ass. As he walks through the halls a sickening stench begins to creep into his nostrils. It reminds him of the stench of disinfectant spray and rotten fruit.. with perhaps a hint of kitty litter.
Creeping through the eery forum, keeping eyes and ears ready, he jumps at a hissing sound to the right. Turning swiftly, he brings his shotgun to bear.
He scared the leaky pipe real bad.
Shaking his head, TekD continues onward. A thick fog is beginning to collect in the forum, making it hard to distinguish shapes in the distance. The fog smells even stronger of disinfectant and rotten fruit.
Suddenly, out of the fog, a figure stumbles forward. TekD pauses, recognizing the figure despite it being obscured by the mist.

"Dio!! Wtf are you doin down here?! Dio? You ok man? DIO!!!"

The figure that surely was Dio continues to stumble forward, aiming a pistol at Tek.

"Wtf man?! Knock it out! This aint a joke!"

While his mind stumbles over the situation, Tek's legs force him to dive to the ground.. just as as Dio opens fire. Realizing he cant keep rationalizing with Dio, TekD pumps a round into the chamber and fires the left barrel.
Dio is thrown back against the wall, a hole torn clean through his stomach. His eyes look down at the gaping wound through his torso, then look back at TekD... grinning evily.

"WTF?!!"

Tek aims again, this time at the head. A clean shot blows off the top half of Dio's head. The body falls to the ground twitching. Humans dont die like that. TekD, stumbling to his feet, moves over to the body. The reeking smell is almost overwhelming. Dio's skin is leathery and cold, as if he'd been dead for days. The realization is too much for TekD to handle: A zombie.
Throwing up in the corner, TekD tries to gather his thoughts.

"A fuckin zombie. No way in hell... a fucking zombie"

[TekDragon]

Leaning against the wall, vomit trailing from his mouth, TekD tries to gather himself.

"All right man, you gotta collect yo shit. This aint the time to lose it. Reconnaisance mother fuker! Gather yo shit and check yo six!"

Rationalization takes over and Tek stumbles away from the wall and checks the area. The pale fog obscures his vision and he can barely make out the dark form lying on the ground that used to be Dio.

"Fuck me over and out..a zombie. What the fuck happened here?"

Realizing the answers would not come to him just standing around like a newb, TekD decides to push farther into the forum.. farther down.. towards whatever evil lurks ahead.
Before leaving TekD takes the pistol from Dio. The leathery hand is cold and dry but retains a grip on the gun. TekD has to pry the dead fingers off the grip.
Armed now with a shotgun and a pistol... TekD continues on.

[Peacemaker]

Peacemaker shakes doobz awake, it is now dark and TekD is still sitting there drooling like a pig.

"Dude what the hell is up with him? Did he smoke too much or something?"

Peacemaker grabs TekD by the head and shakes him vilolently.

[TekDragon]

TekD continues onward, into the darkness, into the gloom. The walls of blue and black concrete seem to be seeping the chalky fog into the air. Running his hand over the wall, Tek shivers. The wall is cold, graveyard cold.
It all seems to build up in his mind. The fog, the stench, the stumbling undead zombie that used to be Dio... its too much for any man to take. TekD breaks into a run down the hall. The sound of his shoes slamming into the stone floor echo like claps of thunder.
The little part of his mind still thinking yelled at him to stop, to reconiter, to check his six. It didnt matter anymore. TekD was consumed by a need. A desire to find whatever it was that had done that to Dio... a desire to destroy it.
Suddenly the hallway ended. In front of him was a wooden door. Slinging his shotgun and taking out his pistol, Tek moved up to the door and placed his ear to it. He could hear the faint sound of someone pacing back and forth.
Backing up a step, TekD took a deep breath, readied his pistol, and kicked down the door. He wasnt prepared for what he saw.
{BOHICA} Navaron looked up at Tek with dry, dead eyes. An evil grin cracked the leathery skin of his face.. and he began to stumble forward, long yellow nails reaching for Tek's neck.
This was too much for TekD. Here was a man who Tek respected. Shooting this undead wouldnt be enough. TekD had to destroy this travesty.
Aiming down, Tek took a shot off at Navaron's knees, blowing out both of them. No shadow of pain crossed his face, the dry eyes never stopped looking at Tek. Now, crawing forward with his arms, Navaron began to speak. A voice that sounded as if it came from across a desert, from across a crypt, creeped out of Navaron's gaping mouth.

"... crossing the styx.. all crossing over.. death.. evil... coming for you... reworking all..."

This was the first time Tek realized that these zombies might be able to talk. Checking his killer rage, Tek advanced on the undead corpse dragging itself towards him. He unslung his shotgun and pointed it at a shoulder just as dead fingers began clutching at his pants. The boom of the shotgun echoed in his ear as the arm was ripped off from the torso. Taking aim again, Tekblew off the other arm.
Navaron's torso and legs flopped uselessly on the ground, mouth opening and closing aimlessly, half words and rants spewing forth.
TekD kicked the body over onto its back and kneeled down ontop of the zombie, pinning it to the ground. Leaning over he put his face right up to the leathery skin that used to be Navaron's head.

"What the fuck are you?"

[Doobz]

:thumbsup:

[TekDragon]

"What the fuck are you?"

TekD repeated the question, yelling it into the dry, unblinking eyes sunk into the skull of what used to be {BOHICA} Navaron. In responce, Navaron opened his mouth as if to scream. Instead of a scream a black millipede crawled out of his throat and into his hair.
Holding his vomit down Tek puts his pistol into Navaron's mouth.

"Talk. NOW"

Navaron begins to talk, voice muffled by the barrel jammed into his mouth. Tek withdraws the pistol and Navaron continues talking as if nothing had happened.

"...is the key.. Hamma knows... deepness and darkness.... all the dead coming.. crossing the styx.. all crossing over.. death.. evil... coming for you... reworking all... the gate is the key... Hamma knows..."

Navaron repeated himself again.. and again. A shiver ran down Tek's spine. The voice was repeating itself exactly, like a tape recorder. With trembling fingers Tek put the barrel of the gun to Navaron's skull.

"You want this?"

Navaron's eyes for the first time seemed to focus on Tek's eyes and he spoke in a harsh whisper.

"You will be one of us..."

The ring of the gunshot echoed a long time in Tek's ears, but at least the zombie wasnt talking anymore.

[BUGGER]

this like the descussion thread......just horribly wrong.

[Sputty]

Sputty finds a kitten and gives it a squeeze, then after falling through a hole he realises he fell into kitten land. This great land is full of thousands of kittens frolicing through rolling fields of grass and the kittens love to be squeezed and they're very small or very fat! Also, Schopenbulb protects them.

[ObnoxiousFrog]

ObFrog, disgusted at this debauchery of a thread, pulls out a Glock .45 and loads it with flesh-shredder rounds. Taking aim at Tek, he squeezes the trigger.
Suddenly, SERPUS leaps out and takes the bullet. Realizing that he has found prey far more worthy of his lead blessing, ObFrog lands 2 more rounds into SERPUS at point-blank range.
Jesus decsends from the sky and gives ObFrog a plaque of valor for smoting SERPUS. Happy orphans dance at the feet of our heroes, and kittens prance freely in the magical lavender fields.

[Onizuka]

im becoming worried about tek more and more :D

[TekDragon]

Ok, i am really stoned now. If you guys would like i can continue with the story. I was thinkin about it while chillin on the patio.

Ill put it to a vote though, dont want to spam the forum for nothin.

[Doobz]

sure, continue on

[Onizuka]

i guess teks friend came with the herbs :)

[TekDragon]

Wiping off the gore that had spattered on his arms, TekD continued looked around at the room. Against a wall was a desk, on top of which a computer monitor flickered. He walked up to the monitor and read the blinking letters.

-- Shitty Post Disposal System = OPEN --
-- Warning! Sig Bot Defence Drone = ACTIVATED --

Tek looked at the screen and tried to make sence of the message blinking in the screen. He didnt know what the hell the shitty thread disposal system was and he sure as hell didnt want to meet the Sig Bot.
Pressing 'enter' brought him into a new screen with a question:

-- Armory Doors = LOCKED --
-- Open Armory Doors? (y/n) --

"Hell the fuck yeah!!"

TekD exclaimed as hit 'y' then 'enter'. In the next room, opposite from where he came in, he heard the sound of metal sliding on metal.

"Cant help it," he mumbled to himself, "im a born button pusher".

The door to the next room was metal, and locked with a finger print ID pad. Tek looked at the ID pad for a moment, shrugged, turned around, and grabbed one of {BOHICA} Navaron's dismembered arms. Pressing the cold, dead, flesh onto the ID pad resulted in a friendly chime and the door sliding open.

What waited on the other side of the door, was sure as hell not friendly. A river of green, glowing, slime ran through the middle of a huge room. Pillars dotted the room in symetrical patterns. The thick slime poured from a pipe high on one wall, flowed down a wide trench, and emptied into a grate on the opposite wall. A large sign next to the pipe warned:

-- Danger! Spam/Gh3y Thread Disposal System! DO NOT BLOCK! --

"Huh," Tek grunted to himself, "I wondered where all the shitty threads went to"

The trench through which the slime flowed from pipe to grate was wide, over 3 meters. It was impossible to guess how deep it was, but he sure as shit didnt want to try testing the waters.
Suddenly, another sign caught his attention on his side of the slime river. Only one word, but it was one hell of a beutiful word to Tek's eyes: ARMORY. Underneath the sign was a large metal door frame that stood gaping open.

Grinning like a kid in a candy store TekD ran over to the armory door, when the whole chamber shook. It sounded as if someone had just slam dunked a shopping mall. The room shook again and he barely managed to keep his balance. Suddenly, on the opposite side of the river of slime, a huge crack appeared in the blue/black granite wall. TekD did NOT want to find out what was on the other side of that wall, but God didnt give a flying fuck. The next smash blew out a huge section of solid granite and left a hole fully 3 meters wide and 6 meters tall. Tek tried to imagine what could blow through a wall like that.

What stepped through the gaping hole made TekD wish he had never asked.

[Sando138]

Resident Evil 68923
Code: Spam

[TekDragon]

Looming in the gaping hole, shrouded by dust from the smashed wall, stood the looming shadow of a 5 meter tall monster. Tek could barely make out a muscular figure with a head that appeared to have horns jutting out the sides. Underneath those horns were two glowing red eyes.

"Shit" TekD mumbled.

Suddenly the light flickered, then died. Obviously a power unit was knocked out while the monster was dickin around with the wall. The only light in the huge chamber came from the glowing river of slime which bathed the room in a pale green glow. The fog, which was not as heavy as before, still misted across the floor. Between the dim green glow, the misty fog, and the pillars littering the room, it was damn hard to make out anything.

The dark outline of the monster shifted and took a step forward. Rubble beneath its feet was ground to dust as it stepped into the room. Tek quickly darted behind the nearest pillar and peered out from behind it.

The evil red eyes moved from side to side as the monster scanned the room, searching for something.

TekD made a quick decision and decided that he didnt want to be what that thing discovered. Moving silently, he ducked from pillar to pillar towards the armory door, always keeping out of sight of the monster, whatever it was.

Darting through the metal doorframe took him completely out of sight of the monster. TekD breathed a sigh of relief and looked around the small room, lit by a single emergency light over a door on the opposite side.

[starrider]

cool....finish it man.

[1024]

1024 jumps in, does a backflip, then jumps back out.

[lightfire]

i im the only surviver of this incident in the main squad im wandering around the toxinplant trying to find the escape door then as i turn the corner 5 imps start throwing fireballs at me i run for cover but as soon as i do they barbaque it i run with only a few bullets left in my pistol from the spider being with the chaingun on it i tryed to pry the chaingun off but it wouldnt buge
so i went back to the elevator shaft.






(tek should find me soon)

[Peacemaker]

Sorry lightfire, Tek owned u and handed you your own ass on a silver plater decorated with your balls.

[TekDragon]

Originally posted by Peacemaker
Sorry lightfire, Tek owned u and handed you your own ass on a silver plater decorated with your balls.

*sob* Im sorry!! I mistook his newbish wandering as the evil shambling of a zombie!

*tries to re-attach lightfire's head*

Friends, right?

;)

[EDIT]
Ill get to further installments as soon as i can. Im about to drive to DC and chill with my bro. When I get back its open fucking season on zombies :)

[Peacemaker]

Originally posted by TekDragon
*sob* Im sorry!! I mistook his newbish wandering as the evil shambling of a zombie!

*tries to re-attach lightfire's head*

Friends, right?




:rofl: Hahahaha :rofl:

[lightfire]

.... i just respawned what the beep ing hell? damn il i got is a fists now... grr tek you idiot

[Yuyi]

Dude tek i agreed with your opininon on weed but jesus do you have to say your high or stoned in every fucking thread. Give it a rest man.

[Powerflux]

http://deadline.phalanxhost.com/bookburn.gif

[Peacemaker]

Powerflux, No man. just no!

[Onizuka]

Originally posted by lightfire
grr tek you idiot

when did this revalation come to you? :)

[lightfire]

tek was in idiot for shooting me not like you for being in ass to make your self look high and mighty and uh i think squeeky died or has left PSU.com permanetly

[ObnoxiousFrog]

Ummm hi....
Have you heard of this little thing called "punctuation"? Its pretty fun, you should try it sometime!
Observe:>}{>}>}[.][.[>.[/[.{.{}>][>{>>>{}>}>?}>}{:|}:}:|>{>\]]=-=/\/}/]/}|/\]/?!^&*()}{|}.,..,./><
See? Wasn't that fun as a barrel of monkeys?

[Onizuka]

that was as gay as a barrel of homo monkeys

[Robot]

Originally posted by Onizuka
that was as gay as a barrel of homo monkeys

another one to add to your collection!

ZING

[Onizuka]

if you quote me on it, show frogboys post first because it would sound stupid if you didnt. (tek did this and look whats happened to him)

[ObnoxiousFrog]

Shit, lightfire isn't the only one having trouble with his periods...

[lightfire]

you mean this poriod . or a womens.





im not a girl..... .!

[Sando138]

He means this period. .

[TekDragon]

Ok, no more juvinile hi-jacking of my stoned-rambling story thread.

Ill get to finishing the story soon, i swear. I havent had much time for PSU cause of the evil that is my job.

[lightfire]

that sucks