Funniest One Liners in PS

[Cirkusphreak]

Just starting a small thread to see if anyone else has noticed that people say some of the funniest, off the wall and random things in PS. Screenshots are welcome as are quotes. I'd like to see what you guys sometimes hear/see.Thanks



:usa:

[Hamma]

STOP BLOWING UP THE GENS NEWB

[BUGGER]

i once saw a sunerer 10 feet off the ground becuase i was lagging (i got pic, but nowhere to host), and some1 said randomly, "i want a turntable".

[NiteTiger]

Said by an outfit mate after I had some fun with an ACE

"Awww, did the big bad MAX get bitched by an infil?"

He made it a macro :)

[MJBuddy]

"1 infiltrator with a boomer vs 1 AI MAX, dont fuck with the inf"

right after i killed a locked down AI Terran MAX

[Kikinchikin]

"Wow, ANTS should fly."

After dropping out of a galaxy, and landing in a base that was at 0 percent with vanu on every side of the base.

[Lonehunter]

I once saw a TR Infil cicling around a Vanu w/reinforced, and knifing him to death as the Barney just spun around shooting his static gun. Afterwords the Infil simply said, "Bitch"

[MilitantB0B]

Disclaimer: This happened at the END OF BETA.)
Once upon a time, there was a pilot named ObnoxiousFrog. One day, during a battle over a tower on Cyssor., ObFrog flew past a pilot inferior to himself named Zshazz. In a fit of rage and stupidity, Zshazz shoots down ObFrog's already-damaged Reaver for almost hitting him. As ObFrog goes to the nearby Tech Plant to buy a new Reaver, Zshazz rockets his defenseless prey who did nothing. The following convo ensues:

ObnxiousFrog: Why the fuck did you do that?
Zshazz: For flying like a dumbass.
ObnoxiousFrog: So you shoot me down for dodging fire, then rocket me as I go to get a new plane? Brilliant plan, dumbass!
Zshazz: Yea I did think it was a good plan.

So, as ObFrog is zooming off in his new Reaver, he looks at the ground to see if a pilot there is Zshazz. It is, so he darts off upward. Zshazz, in all of his dumb bastard glory, shoots down ObFrog once again. Chat transcript:

ObnoxiousFrog: wtf?!?
Zshazz: U almost hit me while i was repairing, i would have been royally pissed.
ObnoxiousFrog: So....you shot me down for not hitting you?
Zshazz: Yep
ObnoxiousFrog: Once again, brilliant plan, you royal fucktard

OK, now ObFrog is really pissed. He keeps flying over Cyssor, battling TR as they come, when he falls upon a convoy. A convoy of a Sunderer and.....a Reaver. He scans the aircraft, and God-be-damned, it's Zshazz! Already tasting the sweet nectar of revenge on his lips, ObFrog waits, trailing just beyond sensor range. Then, it happens. Zshazz stops to a hover for a few seconds. The few precious seconds in which ObFrog would wreck his revenge. Launching a full salvo of rockets into Zshazz, ObFrog is completely unremorseful to his deed. He ends his job with one solemn word to his opponent:

ObnoxiousFrog: Fucker
nuff said.

[ObnoxiousFrog]

Thank you, thank you.
/me bows.

[1024]

I'm still looking for that guy.

DEATH TO ZSHAZZ!!!

[ObnoxiousFrog]

1024, I'm pretty sure he's on Emerald, if he's on at all.

Anyways, to all you new guys, the Zshazz thing s from a now-ancient thread I made called "Tale of a Just TK". Even tho MilitantBob quoted the whole story, there are a lot of funny responses to the story.

BTW, if you put your forum settings to display the threads in the last 100 or so days, said thread is on page 32 near the top....

[1024]

I lvoed that thread. I want it to be a sticky. But im just a little ol' regular poster with A TITLE HE DOESNT WANT!!! :mad: :mad:

[ObnoxiousFrog]

Sorry, but:
OHSNAP!!

[Airlift]

Here's a fairly funny one: We were somewhere, fighting someone, and one of the guys killed Miir... "I bet he won't make a movie of that"

[RUEN]

Here's a fairly funny one: We were somewhere, fighting someone, and one of the guys killed Miir... "I bet he won't make a movie of that"

:lol:

[BUGGER]

i would.......





o yea, words from yesterday,

friend-where are you?
friend-u still there?
me-yea, sry, catfight with a sunderer.....it didn't like my shooting habits....

[Sam_F7]

My bud drives the Sunderer a lot (I gun). His grief points are starting to climb as he wheels it through the base. Reversing is especially painful as there is no rear view mirror.

So I mapped a new Macro.

Everytime he starts to go in reverse...

/L BEEP BEEP BEEP

SamF7

[12tontuna]

Once, I was hunting down rogue infs outside a tower with my Surged TR MCG guy.

I stop and crouch, because I've spotted one moving to flank me.

He stops moving.

And starts firing his Beamer at me.

I saunter up to him, MCG just blazing.


"nice kill on an inf with a MCG, fucktard" said he.

"thanks for turning on your flashlight" said I.

[1024]

About a week after the darklight bug started happening(where the darklight icon doesn't appear next to someones name), i was killed by some guy. He sent me a tell afterwards that said:

Idiot: LOL!!1 You looked like a rabbit in front of my headlights!!!!1
Me: Ya, well if it wasn't for the stupid darklight bug, i'd be a rabbit in front of your headlights with a FUCKING FLARING AMP IN YOUR NUTS!!!


:mad: FIX THE DARKLIGHT BUG!!! :mad:

[Fire_Monkey]

Originally posted by Airlift
Here's a fairly funny one: We were somewhere, fighting someone, and one of the guys killed Miir... "I bet he won't make a movie of that"

Heh it was on Amerish, think Hijinks got him, Miir was trying to run us down in his AMS. :nono:

[RushHourKonried]

Originally posted by 1024
About a week after the darklight bug started happening(where the darklight icon doesn't appear next to someones name), i was killed by some guy. He sent me a tell afterwards that said:

Idiot: LOL!!1 You looked like a rabbit in front of my headlights!!!!1
Me: Ya, well if it wasn't for the stupid darklight bug, i'd be a rabbit in front of your headlights with a FUCKING FLARING AMP IN YOUR NUTS!!!


:mad: FIX THE DARKLIGHT BUG!!! :mad:

:D :D :D :D

[Stimulate]

"Stim, did you not see the lava and the cliff?"

[Jakal]

lol. this is some funny stuff

[Sentrosi]

Earlier last week we had a squad start taking some NC bases from under them. I kill a lone NCer and he /tell me

"I'm bringing the war to you guys. Be ready!"

I reply back, "Bring it on, I prefer a straight fight than to all this sneaking around."

His reply, "Stargate, right?"

I reply (after I look up to the heavens thinking, "Heathen"), "Nope, Star Wars."

His reply, "Never heard of it."

I'm old.

[Streamline]

TrailRix: "It puts the lotion on the skin."

I think he was getting a repair or a rez.

[Diddy Mao]

Over Global Chat one Day a Cr 5 Commander asked "Could I please have 5 max's in Itans CC" when! we are under seige by the Vanu! Before i promptly bitched him out i had a giggle or two!

[Sentrosi]

hehe, 5 max's = overkill. Especially in Itan's CC. You can defend it with only 2 and an advanced medic/engineer.

That CR5 needed to be bitch slapped. TY for doing it.

[Phex]

On Johari there is a Vanu player named HowsMyDriving. Take a wild guess at one of his certs. Yep, MagRider. Absolutely hysterical when you see:
"HowsMyDriving [magpicture] Person01
HowsMyDriving [magpicture] Person02
HowsMyDriving [magpicture] Person03" etc.

Want proof? http://myplanetside.station.sony.com/character.jsp?charId=424088&worldId=12

:D

[TheAngelOfWar]

funny/stupid messages? any continental messages from Malone should do it.

and all the people who say "this base needs an ant" as they sit there not getting an ant themselves. i hate all you fuckers that do this. this probably includes people i know.

[12tontuna]

Angel, I had that same thing happen to me.

I asked for an ANT run on the current objective. I was told to do it myself. Of course, the guy who did so was standing next to me, and could see that I was in a Pounder Max suit.

That, and I have no Vehicle Certs doesn't help.

Here's another one for you.

Insane guy runs up to the walls of a base I'm defending. He's NC, so guess what weapon he's got, just a blazing? That's right. I calmly pounderize him from the walls.

"Nice cheap fucking kill, pounderpussy" says he.
"Jackhammer that." says I.

/ignore NC arse.

Have a nice day.

[Strygun]

I like it when you see a friendly killed another friendly with his knife, and then the guy who killed the other guy says, "oops"

[Hamma]

Yea like when I am chasing Ouro with surge on, full chainblade on. It usually results in me laughing on TS however, not a text line.

[BeerJedi]

I think the funniest one liners i've seen was some galaxy pilot was tryin' to land his gal near or in a base. i say near or in as he was tryin' for ever. Next thing I see froma broadcast...

"CAN I GET A VALET TO PARK THIS DAMN THING!!"

[BrutiusLlyod]

the best I've seen to date was someone say - " I HIT IT !"

[Diddy Mao]

Originally posted by Sentrosi
That CR5 needed to be bitch slapped. TY for doing it.

We flew a Galaxy into him the next day! in the sanc ;-)

[Bismarck]

Ok, I have one. I was walking along through the jungle on Hossin, minding my business. I came out on the road, I wasn't even in the middle of it. Then this idiot comes down the road in a basilisk, he swerves to hit me and ran me over.

Me: "Watch where your going dumbass"

Idiot: "Why don't you stay off the road tard"

Me: "Yeah, what was your name again? THE A".....damn I can't finish this joke. Stupid censors.

I can't think of any more....bah

[Solendon]

Originally posted by Bismarck
Me: "Yeah, what was your name again? THE A".....damn I can't finish this joke.

Stupid censors.

All you have to say is "Earmuffs", then you can say anything you want. Balls.... Cock.....

[Revolver]

After miraculously evading enemy fire in my galaxy while flying over a base we soon discovered was PACKED with VS, just as we're about to leave the area, we take a small hit...something like from a pulsar. One of my squadmembers just returned from being AFK a few seconds earlier. En1gma was his name.

*Galaxy takes damage*
[squad] En1gma: Whoa! Where'd that come from?!

[Revolver]

Originally posted by Bismarck
Ok, I have one. I was walking along through the jungle on Hossin, minding my business. I came out on the road, I wasn't even in the middle of it. Then this idiot comes down the road in a basilisk, he swerves to hit me and ran me over.

Me: "Watch where your going dumbass"

Idiot: "Why don't you stay off the road tard"

Me: "Yeah, what was your name again? THE A".....damn I can't finish this joke. Stupid censors.

I can't think of any more....bah Lag can sometimes make crazy predictions, and perhaps to him you weren't where u were, but off to the side, and he swerved to avoid you

[Revolver]

Originally posted by Sentrosi
hehe, 5 max's = overkill. Especially in Itan's CC. You can defend it with only 2 and an advanced medic/engineer.

That CR5 needed to be bitch slapped. TY for doing it. *cough*TriggaNator*cough*

[12tontuna]

Say this one today after I stumbled onto a knife fight between an Agile (my side) and an inf (bad side).

My side won.

"Not bad for not knowing where you were, eh, stealth bitch?"

And no, the winner didn't have darklight.

[MJBuddy]

heh i got trigg yesterday, we were in a big battle and i turned around, my back to the front lines, and gunned him down in front of everyone around me

i was waiting for them to kill me...however, i got alot of /tells saying

"ur the man, the rebellion has started! fight the power!"

[Irenicuz]

It was some early morning hour and a single squad of us had been trying to cap this base for over an hour.... it eventually went neutral and we got the hack started on it, anyway... the one liner was one squaddy saying to another

"hey.... I thought YOU were getting the ant"

followed by "shazbot" as the hack failed... doh...

lol :D

[Glaynor]

A few days ago I'm in a reaver and have no missiles left when I see an enemy AMS leaving a base. I chase and shoot at him with my guns blazing. He went through a forest and I flew low through the forest blasting away. After about five minutes I finally killed him.

He sends a tell, "You only killed me cause you are in an overpowered reaver noob". I laughed and told him to get an escort next time. He replies with a string of profanities talking about my mother and various other family members and what he did to them. I was incredulous and told him that ten year olds shouldn't be allowed to play this game. His response was, "oh, so now you have to make fun of my age cause you have nothing better to say?"

I started laughing so hard at his reply that I almost spilled my drink.

[Winged_Nazgul]

So I'm ninja hacking an AMS out of an enemy base we're hacking and I'm not even out of auto-drive when I see Missile Lock on my screen. I take the striker missiles and try to drive the AMS around the base wall to deploy it. I'm in 3rd person view so I see the TR reinforced guy (NCGArmyofMe) staring at me from the top of the base walls. I'm like "WTF?" so I stop the AMS and send him a tell.

"So you got any more missiles in that Striker?"

He goes "LOL...no. I ran out of them just getting here."

[12tontuna]

Lol.

[Onizuka]

i was once in a cc just waiting then someone, in red letters, in all caps shouts, "My name is [girls name] and i can shoot ping pong balls out of my [you know]!"

that was the weirdest thing.....

[TheRegurgitator]

I had a Pheonix out and i asked a freindly max. How much armor do you have left shock?

[Diddy Mao]

Originally posted by Onizuka
i was once in a cc just waiting then someone, in red letters, in all caps shouts, "My name is [girls name] and i can shoot ping pong balls out of my [you know]!"

that was the weirdest thing.....

Was the Girls Name Wynona Ryder?

[Onizuka]

lol i dont watch squat movies (they all seem the same).........lol

i just cant get over how funny that is

tell me tell me tell me

[Smaug]

South Park movie wooooooo

[Onizuka]

lol smaug im afraid you could possibly be borking the forum layout. put the smurf and that thing under your character,

[12tontuna]

I chased a Vanu Exo around today. He and his buddy were team sniping, and one was an engie.

I tend to fire once, and move the hell somewhere else, so that cover is negated. Four shots later, the one with the repair gun goes down.


"now you're done" I am sent.

His buddy gets out his pulsar and comes for me. I fire up Adv. Targetting and pop him while he's closing. He's like 15m meters from me.

I run around the crest of the hill and come out behind him. I'm spamming V V V (Help!) the whole time. I'm in a standard vest, so I can easily outrun him and out turn him. Funny thing is, he couldn't find me although I stayed directly behind him, spamming V V V.

I calmly shot him again with the Bolter, as I don't carry a backup weapon, only a Med Gun.

This is what he sends me.

"I gotta go flog myself now, I'm so embarassed."

to which I said:

"I don't really know your name, son, but for what it's worth, you certainly have put a smile on my face." (from the Crow)