What to do?

[Fragmatic]

Whenever my friends need help or advice, I'm always there, I cheer them up, and help solve their problems. It makes me feel good about myself, knowing that I can help people.

I spent �40 and sat on a train for 4 hours once to see a friend who said she was suicidal, that night I sat at home smiling knowing that she was still alive, even though I had only met her once previously... we talked every night on msn.

I've never had the best of upbringings, my parents divorced when I was 6, I was stuck living with my mum. I was branded a geek and a loner at primary school, and things didn't change much in secondary school either. I fell into depression and was put on prozac as a "cure". I couldn't take life at my mums, we always moved house all the time, I could never make friends with anyone because of this, so I ran away to move with my dad and things were great. Now my brother lives here too, mum kicked him out when he was 12, and he lived with one of my aunts who never had children of her own, so she spoilt him rotten.

Now dad's struggling to pay for him, they fight and row, the other day I had to call the police to end a fight. My brother always comes home drunk and breaks my things. All through this, I continue to help my friends, because they mean so much more to me than anything else in the world, the other day I got a christmas card from my friend Vic, and she said that she wouldn't be around if it weren't for me. I felt pretty shocked to find out that I was such a burden in somebody's life.

Now It seems that all I ever do is help people, I never have enough time to do anything I want to, and I feel pretty down about it. Every time I see my friends, they're all like "heeeey, it's Hussey!" (Hussey is my surname, people call me by that) and it makes me feel good because I know these people love me for who I am, even though I'm just an overweight computer games player. When I'm at home, it's a different story, my brothers always shouting at me and making me clear up his own mess, whilst my dad is usually at work, I just sit isolated in my room, listening to music, playing guitar, thinking, playing video games.

Sorry for posting this, I needed to get it off my chest, and for once, I need advice from people, I really feel bad because I've isolated myself, because I don't want to be such a burden. :(
Sorry if you think this is shit or whatever, I don't care, you can flame if you want, that will just show your immaturity. I know a forum isn't really the best of places to confide with people and ask advice like this, but it's all I got, and I'm sorry for having to post this here.

All in all, I don't want to go back on Prozac or anything like that again, because it just makes you feel worse, knowing that you've fallen so low to have to take drugs to control your emotions.

[Octavian]

Wow, better ask Hamma or something. I'm not good with advice. But Hamma was once allegedly abused by his mother, he might know what to do.

[TheRagingGerbil]

Talking is good. :bigthumb:

[Octavian]

Yes let it all out. I feel better when I tell someone. We can't exactly help you physically, but we will lend you some advice.

[Fragmatic]

Thanks guys :) I'm sorry I posted it, I just needed to get it off my chest, and I'm sorry I chose this place to do it

[Chaaos]

Talking sure helps alot so keep doing it.

Drugs dont.

I had a gf that was on paxil... messes you up and changes you. Mood swings, loss of sex drive, etc.

I doubt anyone is going to flame you for getting stuff off your chest.

[Glaynor]

Frag, you've had a rough go at things. Sorry to hear that. You mentionned how you have helped your friends a lot and that they really care for you. I am sorta similar in that I am the oldest in my family (that is my entire extended family including cousins). I always did well in school (sports, student gov't, grades etc.) and when my younger family members had problems the parents always asked me to talk to them and try to fix things. It got to be a lot to handle. I ended up turning to my friends for support. Have you turned to the various people you have helped for support? I amsure that they would do everything they can to help you out. BTW how old are you?

[Fragmatic]

Frag, you've had a rough go at things. Sorry to hear that. You mentionned how you have helped your friends a lot and that they really care for you. I am sorta similar in that I am the oldest in my family (that is my entire extended family including cousins). I always did well in school (sports, student gov't, grades etc.) and when my younger family members had problems the parents always asked me to talk to them and try to fix things. It got to be a lot to handle. I ended up turning to my friends for support. Have you turned to the various people you have helped for support? I amsure that they would do everything they can to help you out. BTW how old are you?

17, the thing is, I find it really hard to talk to my friends like that back, because I'm always worried that they'll jump back and tell me to f-off :(

[martyr]

frag, you're a t-shirt ninja. you're set for life.

go to university, embrace your inner geek. you're a great guy obviously, so don't fret about your future.

[Fragmatic]

Martyr, great work on the comics man :) A picture can tell a tale, but a comic can bring a smile to the people who see it :)

I just been thinking, doing some creative stuff, made a nice tune on the guitar that I think I'm gonna record later, and thinking about the business I'm gonna start up next year (FragTech computers, Gonna be the European equivelent to Alienware/Falcon NorthWest)

Things are looking up already, thanks for your support guys :love: :thumbsup:

And yes, that is me in the pic ;)

[ultraviolet]

Frag, I didn't actually get through the original post (had a couple drinks at tonite's office party so my attention span is ZERO), but if you do need a shoulder or someone to talk to, I am DEFINITELY here for you. I have a bit of personal experience about taking drugs for normalcy (aka antidepressants) as well. :love: and huggles, you can drop me a PM or an IM. :)

[martyr]

she said "huggles," don't trust her in her moon-slippers!

[ultraviolet]

Hey, you liked my moon-slippers.... didn't you? :tears up: FINE, I see how it is!

And huggles is a cute word, thank you.

[martyr]

haha, i do like your slippers. i just wear boots. anyway, i was trying to think of a good reason to call you "wench" because i think it's funny.

then i saw something shiny and forgot about it. you know how it is.

[ultraviolet]

haha, yes I do. My boyfriend laughs at me, cos I'll stop and say "ooh, pretty" or "ooh, shiny." Squeeky can vouch for this bad habit of mine.

I would wear pretty, shiny black boots, but I haven't been able to find any in my size. I just wear my comfy Uggs. They keep me happy enough.

[Triggar]

I think with Martyr, it's less "oooh shiny!" and more "oooh! blued finished" or "oooh! serrated!", you know, something of the sort.

Or how about, "oooh! 9mm!" or my personal favorite, "oooh! chest holster!"

[Fragmatic]

Boots? Try THESE (http://www.newrock.es/en/index.shtml)

:D

*goes back to listening to Propaghandi*

Damnit, you bought back my interest in a band I hadn't listened to for years! :rolleyes:

[martyr]

ah, those are pretty sweet.

too much metal for me, though, and the buckles aren't really my style.

i wear these: http://www.zappos.com/images/C/Cat102/Cat102blkd.jpg

[edit]
and "oooh" as triggar put it, for this:

http://secure.fobusholster.net/Merchant2/graphics/00000001/SHR.gif

i heart fobus.

[Fragmatic]

Well... I wear these -
http://www.planetsideimages.com/uploads/fragpashirt.jpg
http://www.planetsideimages.com/uploads/fragshirtninja.jpg
http://www.planetsideimages.com/uploads/guiatario.jpg

And yes, I took these just now, thanks for cheerin me up, this is what you guys get for it, me acting like a fool! :p

The PA shirt is signed by a band called the Von Bondis

[martyr]

haha, it took me a minute to recognize Gabe's shirt. good stuff, there.

i'm wearing: http://www.brentroad.com/photos/00193469.jpg

[Triggar]

You look hot with that black outline.

[martyr]

so do you. if i could wear it in real life, i would.

if i could wear black & grey armor in planetside, i would. so would you.

[Fragmatic]

if i could wear black & grey armor in planetside, i would. so would you.

Join the TR then:lol:

[Triggar]

I think mine would be more black with white cuffs and logo's. Let's design this.

Like that SNL where Sean Hayes and Jimmy Fallon worked in the store that serviced only the �ber cool. We can stroll in on our wraith's and just make fun of people for wearing - gasp - colors.

Even my pajamas are monochromatic. Like now, gray shirt, black pants. You've rubbed off on me and it's sweet :)

[Fragmatic]

Hmm, for me, it would be the following -

Bright Red spiky hair (Don't have it anymore, redoing it)
Glasses
Black Cyberdog t-shirt
Ball chain necklace
Big Baggy jeans
Chain with keys on, jewelerry, my new shoes

[martyr]

I think mine would be more black with white cuffs and logo's. Let's design this.
i'm up for this. i'll rework our vanu agile to our real-world color specs, sounds like good fun

[Fragmatic]

Hey martyr, could you doodle me please? :D

[martyr]

i havent gotten around to drawing commie armor yet, actually. once i've gotten that done, i certainly will.

it won't be soon, though. i'm far, far away from my drawing tools for a month yet.

[Fragmatic]

I'm a commie now? :p

*Hides Che Guevara shirt*

Actually I'm a Socialist and a Marxist :D

[martyr]

haha, i've long maintained my own original nickames for my enemies, and therefore you are, in fact a commie.

and since you're now wondering, i call the NC "charlie."

[Fragmatic]

Barny scum!

[Ait'al]

Barny scum! :domotwak:

[Fragmatic]

:domotwak:
:trrocks:

[Flammey]

Frag, don't sweat it dude. I'll tell you my secret, I read alot of fantasy novels, listen to alot of music, and watch alot of movies. You see, it feel better during those few hours. I can forget all the shit in my life, and I usually do.

[Glaynor]

Frag, you stated that your friends really care for you. My problems was that I hated going to people for help cause I like to do everything myself. When I went to them I was amazed at how supportive they were. And suprisingly they were upset that I didn't go to them earlier. Trust your friends and go to them. You won't be disappointed.

[Happy lil Elf]

"Huggles" makes me think of cute which of course in turn makes me reach for a large, heavy and blunt object :p

[ultraviolet]

I :love: Propagandhi. Apparently, they are no longer. :cries: The lead singer started up a new band, the Weakerthans. I've been listening to a mix of NOFX, Bad Religion, the Vandals, and Against Me! lately.

Nice guitar, ninja. :drool:

[Dharkbayne]

I don't wear clothes, I am in my boxers right now, I have not worn clothes in about 4 days.

[Neon Apocalypse]

sorry to hear that fragmatic, its good to talk, makes u feel better, but u need to find a way to get rid of the problems from your brother, dunno how

[Fragmatic]

Hmmm, if only chainblades were real! :D