Shit... what do I do?

[Mr1337Duck]

My church recently closed the sanctuary for remodelling, and it's about to be reopened. The church youth choir director wants the youth to be represented on Easter, which is when it reopens. My brother, the one I've posted about before, is fine with singing, but I hate it. My voice has two tones, low, and low, but a little bit higher. Problem is, my mom's wanting us to be part of this because she does that little pretending thing that my singing isn't shitty. I said no dice, I don't wanna make an ass of myself with a bunch of songs that require the high, kiddy voice that most kids have, that I don't. So now she's making me go to this thing, I've got 30 minutes to persuade her not to make me go. What the hell do I do?

[SkunkPunk]

Bomb the church.

[Mr1337Duck]

:rofl:
:lol:

[Rbstr]

Just tell her that your not going to do it, becasue you realy don't want to

[Sputty]

If it's a big choir then just do it and don't soing loudly.

[Mr1337Duck]

Nah, it's probably gonna be a bunch of little kids and like 3 people my age.

[Hezzy]

or, if its a small choir, sing loudly so you don't have to do it next time. Sing really crappy too.

[Sputty]

or, if its a small choir, sing loudly so you don't have to do it next time. Sing really crappy too.
:rofl: :rofl:

[OfaLoaf]

Mouth the words.

[VivaLaNuBc4k3]

start squeekin your voice when you talk to her and say that you can't sing in this condition

[BigFreak]

Anyone with a proper Christian attitude wouldn't force you to do stuff against your will. Just say you don't think you're up to it.

[Bighoss]

well first off how old are you? if your 14-18 tell her no, you can't make me sing if I don't want to, I'm not your slave. If singings not your thing then she shouldn't make you do it. If she tells you you have to do it anyone say you'll just skip the practices and stuff. If she threatens to ground you pack up everything she'll take away if you become grounded before she can. It really irks parents because then they feel like your not being punished but they have nothing left to do to you. Or you can do what I do tell her to fuck off casually and then walk away. Problem solved end of story

[Infernus]

Say that singing in church is against your religion... then require that she sacrifice all member's of the petty choir up to your religion in penance for trying to convert you...

[Bighoss]

wait I have an idea its pretty simple. Go take a bicycle spoke and sharpen it until the point is perfect. Then follow your mom into a crowded place like a subway station and stab her where the lungs are really quickly. If you sharpened you bicycle spoke well enough she'll barely feel it and eventually she'll die within a few hours... Well maybe thats a bit extreme, Just threaten to kill yourself :D

[Infernus]

But... then when you don't kill yourself you get sent to one of those special 'talking' doctors... you never wanna go there because well lets face it... who wants to 'talk' this day in age... especially to someone with a high pitched voice that believes in 'peace' and 'democracy'...

[Hezzy]

How about a simple idea? Just say NO!

[AztecWarrior]

Explain your voice situation, or lip-sync if you are forced to go.

[Mr1337Duck]

Those were all wonderful ideas. I had to go anyway, and two of my friends were there, so it wasn't that shitty. The songs sucked as much as ever, though.

[AztecWarrior]

If they didn't do "On Eagle's Wings" then your church sucks.

[Happy lil Elf]

The night before the performance, place a pillow over your face and scream as loud as you can. Do this over and over until you lose your voice. Be sure to wake up early in case you somehow partially get it back overnight (rare, but it can happen).

This will not be good for you, but if you can't get out of it any other way, it is an option.

[AztecWarrior]

Those were all wonderful ideas. I had to go anyway, and two of my friends were there, so it wasn't that shitty. The songs sucked as much as ever, though.
Elf, you're Old Fucking News. It's over. He did it.

[Kaikou]

You could go ahead and do it, and make sure you do it HORRIBLY. Bad enough to publically embarrass your mother into never making you do something you don't want ever again.

[Jaged]

Elf, you're Old Fucking News. It's over. He did it.
Wouldn't a choir be something that you would constantly have to go back to to practice? He could use that next time.

[Happy lil Elf]

Elf, you're Old Fucking News. It's over. He did it.

Obviously I didn't bother reading the whole thread /shrug

[Veteran]

Drink syrup of ipicac beforehand. A couple quick pukes and a nice bit o' bedrest while they're belting it out in the choir.

[Firefly]

Tell your mom to fuck off.

Either that or suck it up and drive on. My question to you is, what the hell good does going to church do for you, your mouth is atrocious. In fact, you don't have a hair on your ass if you don't memorize what you just said and then say it IN church. In front of everyone.

That will GUARANTEE you don't sing in choir.

[Happy lil Elf]

Apparently I missed something.

[ViperGTS]

Set the church on fire, kill the priest and all of the nuns in a bloody druken rage. Dont forget to wright demonic things on the walls with therre blood and brain juice. :evil:

:scared: