You archaically-minded fucksticks...

[Spee]

My names Alex. My brother is Pete. Dad...Is dad.



Alex: I wanna buy a book.
Pete: Which one?
A: The PHB or DMG.
P: Whassat?
A: Dungeons and Dragons.
P: Why ya wanna play that *** game?
A: 'Cause everyone in my school does...
P: Bullshit. Maybe .0005% of your school plays That Game.
A: Actually-
P: No. Walk around this city. any city, and ask all the kids if they play D&D. Only one or two will say yes. Only psychos and druggies play that game anyhow. Anyone whos EVER played that game has died from drugs, or died from a bullet in thier head. Or they work at McDonalds.
A: Youre really wrong, pete.
P: No im not. Dad, how many people played D&D in your highschool?
Dad: They didnt have computer back then, fuckstick.
P: Its not a computer game.
D: Oh, that queer thing. Youre not playing it, Alex. The people who play that commit suicide and shit. There was this big ass investigation on it and shit. Do something important with your free time (Dad turns out ESPN) go out and do something constructive.
A: *seethes in the blatant hypocrisy*
P: So yeah. Youre not getting the book. Now, lets watch Saving Private Ryan. Dad likes the opening sequence.



A simple "no" would have sufficed :mad:

[FlakMan]

f your dad. Go out and buy the book.

[Spee]

f your dad. Go out and buy the book.



No $$$$. Which is why I asked.

[JetRaiden]

:lol: "fuckstick"?

[Mango]

Hey guess what? I wrote any annotaed bibliography for my college english that proves them wrong. Maybe you can show it to them?

Want me to post it?

[Rayder]

Hot damn! So, how will I commit suicide? Pill, knife, gun, rope, train, bridge, water, shark, land mine, sexual exhaustion, or walking into a PETA meeting with a fur coat, aligator shoes and briefcase, elephant wastebasket, and a little button on my ape hair shirt that says "Cows Are Yummy."

[Spee]

Ill go and buy it when I get home, which is in what...2, or 3 days?


Its the principle of the thing. And the pure IDIOCY in the statements shown. I even asked for evidence, and he fed more more bullshit. :mad:

[JetRaiden]

Hot damn! So, how will I commit suicide? Pill, knife, gun, rope, train, bridge, water, shark, land mine, sexual exhaustion, or walking into a PETA meeting with a fur coat, aligator shoes and briefcase, elephant wastebasket, and a little button on my ape hair shirt that says "Cows Are Yummy."

I vote for sexual exhaustion

[Infernus]

tell him that you've found a new hoobie... the Kama Sutra... and you need money to buy the most recent guide... if he inquires as to what the kama Sutra is say that its a sport that involves killing ****...

[Hezzy]

tell him that you've found a new hoobie... the Kama Sutra... and you need money to buy the most recent guide... if he inquires as to what the kama Sutra is say that its a sport that involves killing ****...

I would think nearly everyone knows what the Karma Sutra is. I even asked a random toddler and they explained what it was to me :scared:

[Infernus]

... ... maybe your right but from the sounds of it his dad and brother might not... er no offense...

[Dharkbayne]

I need a new hoobie. :lol:

[Happy lil Elf]

Spee. Your dad is a fucking moron. Your brother is a fucking moron. Please tell them I said this. Then hit them with a bat. A large bat.

[AztecWarrior]

A failure in judgement. I'm sure your dad is a good person outside of this. However, he is in grave error. These are the same people who see skateboarders/hackers/computer gamers as antisocial, sucidial, depressive anarchists.

[I Hate Pants]

Why would you waste time playing D&D when you can play Baulder's Gate with 5 of your friends?

Much easier to play

Lots more fun

No ****** Dungeon Master being a stupid fuck.

[Spee]

No ****** Dungeon Master being a stupid fuck.


I'm the Dm, you jerk :p

[I Hate Pants]

Well when I tried it with my friend's. The dungeon master would always put us in the worst situations.

Im walking across a narrow rope bridge in extremly heavy armour with nothing but a giant mace (Mace's rule!)

* UUUUUUUUUH OH! 6 archer orcs heard you crossing the bridge and are now opening fire on you. You cant use your melee' attacks till you cross. What will you do????*

* Uh, I dunno, lemme think about that one ass wipe!*

*5 secs up! I rolled 3 sixes! Your dead! The bridge snaps under your wieght! Your body falls limplistly to the bottom of the pit. Your body is unretrievable.*

[AztecWarrior]

Well when I tried it with my friend's. The dungeon master would always put us in the worst situations.

Im walking across a narrow rope bridge in extremly heavy armour with nothing but a giant mace (Mace's rule!)

* UUUUUUUUUH OH! 6 archer orcs heard you crossing the bridge and are now opening fire on you. You cant use your melee' attacks till you cross. What will you do????*

* Uh, I dunno, lemme think about that one ass wipe!*

*5 secs up! I rolled 3 sixes! Your dead! The bridge snaps under your wieght! Your body falls limplistly to the bottom of the pit. Your body is unretrievable.*
What? You people don't bring high-caliber weapons to DnD matches?

"Sorry, you died. Your body is unretrievable because I'm an asshole DM."

BLAM!

"MY LEG!"

[Spee]

Well, I'm goign to be a jerk DM, but only if the players are being assholes.


Rogue guy: I rape/murder/pillage the entire town.


DM/Me: The woman you tried to rape has horrible teeth in her vagina. You suffer incredible blood loss and perish.


The actual campaign SHOULDNT have any deaths...Until the last few areas, in which Im making it as tough as humanly possible.

[AztecWarrior]

Well, I'm goign to be a jerk DM, but only if the players are being assholes.


Rogue guy: I rape/murder/pillage the entire town.


DM/Me: The woman you tried to rape has horrible teeth in her vagina. You suffer incredible blood loss and perish.
Never played DnD (observed it once and know a bit about it), but I think that will work.

[I Hate Pants]

Well, I'm goign to be a jerk DM, but only if the players are being assholes.


Rogue guy: I rape/murder/pillage the entire town.


DM/Me: The woman you tried to rape has horrible teeth in her vagina. You suffer incredible blood loss and perish.

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl:

[UncleDynamite]

Hm, I should try my hand at being a Dungeon Master...

DM: "You see a cave."
Warrior: "I enter the cave."
DM: "You walk in, sensing that you're not alone."
Warrior: "I light a torch."
DM: "You see the bane of darkness, a Dharkbayne."
Warrior: "I attack the Dharkbayne."
DM: *rolls dice* "A hit! You delete his Notepad, eliciting foul language and sending him fleeing in humiliation."
Warrior: "Sweet."

[Vitter]

DnD is awesome. If you can get a group of good friends together I guarantee you won't regret playing it.

Spend the time to make a good campaign. I spent 3 months designing a campaign to DM before starting up the game (played by my fiance, her brother, and 2 of her friends). They can't get enough of it.

[Dharkbayne]

Hm, I should try my hand at being a Dungeon Master...

DM: "You see a cave."
Warrior: "I enter the cave."
DM: "You walk in, sensing that you're not alone."
Warrior: "I light a torch."
DM: "You see the bane of darkness, a Dharkbayne."
Warrior: "I attack the Dharkbayne."
DM: *rolls dice* "A hit! You delete his Notepad, eliciting foul language and sending him fleeing in humiliation."
Warrior: "Sweet."

:lol: die.

[1024]

when he's not around, and his wallet is, -- well, you get the picture.

[Kikinchikin]

:rofl: I can't believe your dad actually said those things! Maybe it's just my father, but I don't know any adults that act as immature as that. Did he really say what you typed, or was it more of an exaggeration? Either way he's being a pigheaded ignorant fool.

[Spee]

:rofl: I can't believe your dad actually said those things! Maybe it's just my father, but I don't know any adults that act as immature as that. Did he really say what you typed, or was it more of an exaggeration? Either way he's being a pigheaded ignorant fool.

More or less, those are straight-on, word-for-word texts of the conversation. I may have missed something here and there, but thats what it was.

[Fragmatic]

Dungeowned and Dragowned.

[Bighoss]

you'll thank your dad in a few years.

[Sputty]

Get "caught" having sex with a man...
OWNED

[Spee]

you'll thank your dad in a few years.


for preventing me from doing something which innumerable other people enjoy safely and harmlessly? Oh yes, Ill thank him.


Ill also thank him for trying to get me into sports, something that I couldnt give two shits about.


Tell me, what difference is there in cultishly following sports figures, buying newspapers to see a few numbers, occupying a computer to retreive some other numbers because some idiot told you those numbers were wrong, and Dungeons and Dragons?


Ill tell you - The D&D Kid is going to have a much more fufilling life than the bookie-wannabe prick.

[Neon Apocalypse]

you gotta love how your brother said that your dad likes watching the opening sequence of Saving Private Ryan when your dad said that D&D is a game for violent sociopaths

:lol:

[Angel_of_Death]

for preventing me from doing something which innumerable other people enjoy safely and harmlessly? Oh yes, Ill thank him.


Ill also thank him for trying to get me into sports, something that I couldnt give two shits about.


Tell me, what difference is there in cultishly following sports figures, buying newspapers to see a few numbers, occupying a computer to retreive some other numbers because some idiot told you those numbers were wrong, and Dungeons and Dragons?


Ill tell you - The D&D Kid is going to have a much more fufilling life than the bookie-wannabe prick.
Someone hooked on playing D&D is going to have a much more fulfilling life than a sports fan? Sorry, but I fail to see how you come to that conclusion.

[HunterKiller]

Your dad is awesome, but for a diffrent reason than not letting you get your game.

[oddfish]

DnD... i dunno. i played football. i turned out okay. i mean. i'm a ***, and i like to make really weird silly signatures, and i like promiscuous sex with girls i barely know, and alcohol is a good water subsitute, but aside from that, i'm you're normal average joe. i think i'd have turned out the same way if i played DnD. what i'm trying to say is that playing DnD isn't gonna turn you into a creep, it's how the people around you react to you playing DnD. if they treat you like a creep you're going to start acting like one, unless you have a very strong mind. then they won't be able to use the force to control your mind and tell you that these are not the droids you're looking for. after which you, bill paxton, and micheal bean can kill all the aliens and save the human race. GO BRUINS!

what i'm trying to say is: DnD isn't going to fuck anyone or anything up.. it's the ignorant assholes around you who make it into a problem.

[HunterKiller]

GO BRUINS!

now way, GO AVALANCHE!

[HunterKiller]

GO BRUINS!

no way, GO AVALANCHE!

[oddfish]

no way, GO AVALANCHE!

moosecock

[Sputty]

for preventing me from doing something which innumerable other people enjoy safely and harmlessly? Oh yes, Ill thank him.


Ill also thank him for trying to get me into sports, something that I couldnt give two shits about.


Tell me, what difference is there in cultishly following sports figures, buying newspapers to see a few numbers, occupying a computer to retreive some other numbers because some idiot told you those numbers were wrong, and Dungeons and Dragons?


Ill tell you - The D&D Kid is going to have a much more fufilling life than the bookie-wannabe prick.
Don't take it personally. Bighoss feels he has more experience than he actually does. Not trying to insult Bighoss, but most people feel that way.

[Spee]

Someone hooked on playing D&D is going to have a much more fulfilling life than a sports fan? Sorry, but I fail to see how you come to that conclusion.


In my eyes, he will. But then again, Im of the opinion that your average-joe American is a waste of Oxygen.

[WildEagle]

D&D sux I played atleast 50 times. Everytime I died because of bulshit.
Magic suxxorz too. I'm somewhat flaming but it seems everyone I know that plays those, have no social life.

[Spee]

D&D sux I played atleast 50 times. Everytime I died because of bulshit.
Magic suxxorz too. I'm somewhat flaming but it seems everyone I know that plays those, have no social life.


70% of the time, you die ebcause you did something really dumb.


the other 30 is because your DM is a jerk.

[Infernus]

no way, GO AVALANCHE!

heh whats it matter... the Flyers will win in the end...

[Neon Apocalypse]

D&D is kinda fun. But you have to play with friends that aren't too serious or too little serious about it. It can be fun with the right bunch of people. Spee's dad shouldn't care at all. Just get it and hide it or something. Theres some messed up people in this world. I have no way of telling if you're one of them, but sometimes games can drive people crazy when you get obsessed with them. For you it shouldn't be a problem since you just want to play with people from school. Let me tell you a story of a possible columbine.

I had a friend, well i wouldn't consider him as someone i really know, but we became friends over the internet playing Desert Combat. We started a clan called SOAR which a few people from the previous clan we were both in joined because we decided we didn't like what the leader of that one was doing. Anyways I always thought he was a bit of an odd guy. He liked to make fun of people and show off a bit. But he was cool. Anyways he lived in Pennsylvania in some rural place. His family did lots of hunting so he had access to some weapons. DC is a sort of realistic FPS with modern day weapons. This friend of mine was a bit obsessed with it. He just loved shooting people in it while I was the clan's main pilot. He wasn't the most popular kid in school. Didn't have a girlfriend and he was in 10th grade. I'm not sure if he ever had a good girlfriend who loved him. Eventually the clan thing got boring and I got addicted to PS and i stopped playing DC. The clan was kinda getting boring since the person in charge of the server was always away and couldnt patch it frequently. So we kinda just split. This week I talked to another friend that was in our clan. He told me that my other friend, SFCOBRA was his name, was arrested. What happened was he was talking to a friend from school on AIM and he said he was going to come to school and shoot everyone then commit suicide. I'm not sure if he was drunk or something but he said it. Somehow the word got to someone and the police found out. He was arrested and all his computers discs and electronics were confiscated. He was sent to a mental rehab hospital/ juvenile hall thing. His life is pretty much over. Everyone thinks hes a psychopath. Im not sure if he's tried commiting suicide.

The thing is this kid seemed normal to me at first. FPS games can change people when they become obsessed. Its something you have to be careful of if you think you are weak minded or act without thinking. The kids who did the columbine shootings were addicted to doom and did lots of modding to it.

What I'm tring to say here is that games can change people. What you're dad said was true. There are people addicted to games that get obsessed and do crazy things.

I personally am not worried about myself because I would never intend or even think of killing someone. I could barely come to grips with shooting a deer. Unless i was going to die or something.

As for D&D you just gotta watch out for the obsessed people. I dunno what could happen but who knows. Someone could get obsessed with swords and go out slashing people up or something. There are some fucked up people out there my friend.

[AztecWarrior]

I belive you need a DM who isn't too serious, but serious enough to not have you in an inn with DirecTV watching elf porn. I wish I made that last part up, but I've actually seen that happen.

Granted, it was in 7th grade, but still.

You also need one who doesn't give you a sword and tells you to go kill like 200 goblins. The same applies in reverse, 3 small monsters per session is no good.

[Happy lil Elf]

DnD can be great fun, or it can suck horribly. The key is to have a DM who realizes that while he should make it somewhat challenging for you, because that can be great fun, his goal is not to kill you. His job is to make sure you have a good time. It's not a game of DM vs the players. Considering how much work it takes to be a good DM, it's a rather thankless job, which is one of the reasons I hate doing it. But hopefully you have other players who are also comfortable with DMing and are good at it becasue then they can return the favor.

The way we usually play is everyone in our campaign DMs and has a character. We all know the overall goal for the campaign and thus we are all able to work towards that with the various things we come up with for us to do. Whle DMing your characters is in basically NPC fight mode. You don't get to solve the puzzles, or do a whole lot of character development, but at least you can still contribute and help out if a fight comes up. Then next time another person DMs and you get to play your character to it's fullest while they go into NPC fight mode. I've heard people bitch about how bad of an idea that is but really it's worked out just fine with numerous campaigns at least three of which are now semi retired with chracters in their 30s.

I can't really tell you how to be a good DM for your players though, because it's going to depend entirely upon what your players like. Don't let them get out of control, but at the same time let them do what they want as much as possible. Also, don't be afraid of letting them play evil characters. Two of our highest campaigns are based around evil characters. Oddly enough while we've done some pretty evil crap, we've actually ended up doing a lot of good as well. Keep in mind evil can do good deeds, there just needs to be something in it for them personally most of the time.

For instance in one of our evil campaigns, using a couple of dragon hoards we had "confiscated", we bought every slave we could get our hands on, had them build us a city (and most importantly treated them relatively well while they did so) then said "Congradulations, you just built your new home. Communication and transportation can be provided for any family you'd like to contact or move to here with you." We lost about 15% of them to people decideing they didn't want to live there and whatnot but most of them decided to stay and the population flourished with all the families that came in in the following months. There are bonuses to living in a city where there are no taxes (hunting dragons pays a lot more in the long run, although it is a tad more dangerous...). Not only did we get a relatively pimped out city out of the deal but we got a very loyal group of citizes from which to recruit for armies as well.

In other words let your players do big things, but make the justify it and reason it out. Letting them actually change the world they play in is oftentimes as much if not more fun than just running around killing orcs and kobolds ;)

[Dharkbayne]

D&D is kinda fun. But you have to play with friends that aren't too serious or too little serious about it. It can be fun with the right bunch of people. Spee's dad shouldn't care at all. Just get it and hide it or something. Theres some messed up people in this world. I have no way of telling if you're one of them, but sometimes games can drive people crazy when you get obsessed with them. For you it shouldn't be a problem since you just want to play with people from school. Let me tell you a story of a possible columbine.

I had a friend, well i wouldn't consider him as someone i really know, but we became friends over the internet playing Desert Combat. We started a clan called SOAR which a few people from the previous clan we were both in joined because we decided we didn't like what the leader of that one was doing. Anyways I always thought he was a bit of an odd guy. He liked to make fun of people and show off a bit. But he was cool. Anyways he lived in Pennsylvania in some rural place. His family did lots of hunting so he had access to some weapons. DC is a sort of realistic FPS with modern day weapons. This friend of mine was a bit obsessed with it. He just loved shooting people in it while I was the clan's main pilot. He wasn't the most popular kid in school. Didn't have a girlfriend and he was in 10th grade. I'm not sure if he ever had a good girlfriend who loved him. Eventually the clan thing got boring and I got addicted to PS and i stopped playing DC. The clan was kinda getting boring since the person in charge of the server was always away and couldnt patch it frequently. So we kinda just split. This week I talked to another friend that was in our clan. He told me that my other friend, SFCOBRA was his name, was arrested. What happened was he was talking to a friend from school on AIM and he said he was going to come to school and shoot everyone then commit suicide. I'm not sure if he was drunk or something but he said it. Somehow the word got to someone and the police found out. He was arrested and all his computers discs and electronics were confiscated. He was sent to a mental rehab hospital/ juvenile hall thing. His life is pretty much over. Everyone thinks hes a psychopath. Im not sure if he's tried commiting suicide.

The thing is this kid seemed normal to me at first. FPS games can change people when they become obsessed. Its something you have to be careful of if you think you are weak minded or act without thinking. The kids who did the columbine shootings were addicted to doom and did lots of modding to it.

What I'm tring to say here is that games can change people. What you're dad said was true. There are people addicted to games that get obsessed and do crazy things.

I personally am not worried about myself because I would never intend or even think of killing someone. I could barely come to grips with shooting a deer. Unless i was going to die or something.

As for D&D you just gotta watch out for the obsessed people. I dunno what could happen but who knows. Someone could get obsessed with swords and go out slashing people up or something. There are some fucked up people out there my friend.

It's not DC that did that to him, it's being batshit crazy that did that to him.

[Infernus]

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I agree... I play a multitude of FPS's and I'll they;ve done to me is tell me how to press 'x' (or the variant on whichever system) to shoot a "bullet" at somebody... the most a video agme will teach you is terms, only severly troubled people are actually edge into mass homicide by them...

[Spee]

:rofl: :rofl: :rofl: I agree... I play a multitude of FPS's and I'll they;ve done to me is tell me how to press 'x' (or the variant on whichever system) to shoot a "bullet" at somebody... the most a video agme will teach you is terms, only severly troubled people are actually edge into mass homicide by them...


Thats kinda wrong. As a young boy, I learned shitloads about nukes from MGS.

[Neon Apocalypse]

i dunno dhark, im sure it could have done it to him, he was also really into DoD. He had an obsession with guns, and he was addicted to DC. It is possible.

[MrPaul]

It's from the first page, but I feel the need to quote this...
I would think nearly everyone knows what the Karma Sutra is. I even asked a random toddler and they explained what it was to me :scared:
Dude... what were you asking a toddler about the karma sutra for eyy?

Spee - MGS taught you ABOUT nukes, but it didn't teach you how to make one, if anything surely it would put you off of ever wanting anything like that to happen, what with the stories of radiation that killed hundreds of thousands?

I reckon people are looking at the wrong place to blame for people becoming violent, it's not games, it's not movies, it's the people themselves. I'll bet they'll blame the 'net next, because you can find many sites telling you how to make explosives (although on a recent news show on the BBC, they showed how to make a potentially lethal terrorist bomb... wise ey? :rolleyes: ). Hell, lets blame books ( Anarchists Cookbook par example )

I'm gonna stop there before I start talking about psychology...

[Infernus]

Thats kinda wrong. As a young boy, I learned shitloads about nukes from MGS.
hmm... good point I shoulda phrased that better... but it was a saturday and thusly a "no thinking" day...

...and though you learned tons about nukes did you feel compelled to go out and build one and/or nuke something...

[Spee]

...and though you learned tons about nukes did you feel compelled to go out and build one and/or nuke something...


No, but man. If I could have built MGR, I would have, simply for cool factor.

[Infernus]

No, but man. If I could have built MGR, I would have, simply for cool factor.

Well... me too I guess...

[Dharkbayne]

i dunno dhark, im sure it could have done it to him, he was also really into DoD. He had an obsession with guns, and he was addicted to DC. It is possible.

Yes, he liked shooting people BEFORE that, I'll bet he was an avid hunter/wanted to be, or paintballed, went to shooting ranges alot, ect.

[SDM]

ect.

[1024]

etc.*

[SDM]

ekt.

[1024]

et cetera.

[Dharkbayne]

You guys suck. :p