Caligula, 2/12/01 - 9/5/04

[oddfish]

Well, it's about fucking time I got back on this muhfucking forum, right? right.

I'm back, nillas. Back fo' good (hopefully, as long as Hurricane Ivan behaves himself)

Anyways, as I said, like a dragoon in StarCraft, i have returned.

i have some sad news though...


during Frances' wrath and fury, i was trying to move my nana and papa out of their house down to my uncle Cal's house so that we'd all be together when the storm hit. My cat, caligula, was staying with my nana and papa whilst i'm in school since we're not allowed to have pets in the dorms.. *sigh*

well, while trying to get the cat out of the house it got freaked by a gust of wind that knocked a dogwood tree down in the front of the house. fucking little panzy-ass tree.

it jumped out of my arms and ran into the street where, NO it didn't get hit by a car, it got hit by a piece of someone's house. i don't really know what the fuck hit it because it just kept on flapping down the street with the wind. meanwhile, my cat lay in the street. i didn't want to go look at it. but i had to. i ran over to my little buddy and saw that he was still breathing so i picked him up and ran toward the car and told Travis that he had to help me get my nana and papa to my uncles house fast so we could get my cat somewhere like to a vet or something. then, being a NON-retard i realized how idiotic that request was, so, i just held my friend in the car until he died.

probably the coolest fucking cat ever. he was hyper and violent and playful and smart. he would walk across my digital art pad when i had it set up at the beach house just to piss me off, i know it. he was the best. i'm gonna miss my little buddy. fucking world pisses me off sometimes. i really liked that cat... wtf. :(

[JetRaiden]

:tear:

poor little guy.


losing a cat for me can be harder then losing a relative. my kitty lil russ is my best companion, hes always at my side, always there to cheer me up, very affectionate to everyone he meets. I recommend a cat to anyone, they make perfect little house companions, and can relieve boredom.

[OfaLoaf]

:( My condolences. Losing a pet is always hard.

[TheN00b]

:tear:

Cats are the best. Losing one must really suck :(.

[Mr1337Duck]

:(

I'm sorry for your loss, my own dog is old, she hasn't got many years left, sometimes I play the thought of hearing the news in my mind, and it hurts. And that's nothing compared to what you must be feeling, because it isn't all in your head.

:-(

[DaShiznit]

I may be a dog lover, but I feel sorry for your loss.

[Infernus]

:(

DUDE WTF!

:tear: :(

[Biohazzard56]

Thats sad, my condolences go out to you.

[Sputty]

...:(

[oddfish]

...:(


sputty.. you and i have to work on a way to make cats impermiable and indestructible.












*sigh*.. the worst thing was just sitting there in the front seat of the car while the little guy just slowly started to drift off. his breath got shorter and shorter and then that was it. i just pet him the whole time but he was pretty busted up.

i blame this all on god. fucker..

[Triggar]

Poor kitty, I'm so sorry Oddfish.

When Martyr and I get another cat, we'll name him Caligula after your little buddy.

You're welcome to visit Isis whenever you want.

[DaShiznit]

/me lends Oddfish his flameshield because of that last comment

You're gonna need this....

[Triggar]

Let him blame it on God, I won't flame him for that. People blame everyone and anything when they're mourning. I hope he realises that God doesn't kill kittens, even after people masturbate.

[oddfish]

Poor kitty, I'm so sorry Oddfish.

When Martyr and I get another cat, we'll name him Caligula after your little buddy.

You're welcome to visit Isis whenever you want.


thanks, Triggar..


*sigh* i just want the little bastard back.. three years wasn't enough..


EDIT: i was kidding about blaming it on god.. me lends PSU my twisted sense of humor. although, it's pretty fucked up that that piece of house was coming down the street right when the little guy ran out of my arms..

:(.. maybe God's trying to tell me something.. maybe he's punishing me. MAYBE i just can't accept the fact that SHIT HAPPENS and that God has nothing to fucking do with it! Maybe i'm just acting like an immature little prick because my favorite pet EVER just died for no fucking reason in my ARMS and there was NOTHING i could do about it. maybe i'm just not dealing with this properly. perhaps i should take up a pottery class, or maybe i should rearrange my sock drawer. yeah. sure. or perhaps i'll set a few dozen restore points on my computer and then run Ad-aware a dozen times. maybe i'll read a book!

yeah. i dunno.. maybe i'll just blame it all on Al-queada.. and please, make me aware if i spelled that wrong.

[Squeeky]

He is a martyr, allah ackbar little buddy. May you get 71 pussy virgin's.

[oddfish]

Squeeky.. i'm just gonna smile and nod. :) :nod:

and, you can keep the virgins.. can i just have my cat back? :(

[Squeeky]

I was tryin to cheer ya up :(

I'm sure he's chillin in heavin wif a 40 like the little gangster he is.

[oddfish]

I was tryin to cheer ya up :(

I'm sure he's chillin in heavin wif a 40 like the little gangster he is.


i know, squeeks :) :)

and trust me, you did..

i just want the little bastard to jump across my art pad..

but, yeah.. though, Caligula seems more like the kind of cat that would enjoy a Martini or a dry Chardonay.. perhaps scotch, on the rocks, if he's feeling frisky.

[Triggar]

Do you have any pictures of him?

EDIT: I told my sister about your kitty, she said:

IWonTheLenox (22:28:06): stop! i'll cry
IWonTheLenox (22:28:08): i'm not kidding
IWonTheLenox (22:28:12): i'll burst out into tears

:(

[oddfish]

Do you have any pictures of him?

EDIT: I told my sister about your kitty, she said:

IWonTheLenox (22:28:06): stop! i'll cry
IWonTheLenox (22:28:08): i'm not kidding
IWonTheLenox (22:28:12): i'll burst out into tears

:(


a bunch, but they're all at my uncle calvin's place in a box and they're probably under boxes of shit because it was one of the boxes i moved from my papa's joint. i'll post some of the little guy A.S.A.P.

you guys have to see how evil this cat looked. he was the shit.







wow.. okay.. i really miss him..

[Triggar]

Let it out, buddy. We won't make fun of you.

[oddfish]

Let it out, buddy. We won't make fun of you.


i'm just not used to losing things..

i always push things away before they can get too close to hurt me when they leave...

i wasn't ready for this.. this wasn't something that was part of my plan. it came out of nowhere and just kinda put everything else in the background.

i just watched him run out into the street. then he got hit.

i should've run out after him. or i probably should've put him in the car first. i dunno. i could've put him in something like a box or a little cage or something. that was stupid.

it's just really fucked up because every time i think about the little shit all i can think of is sitting in the front seat of the car listening to him breathing with the rain hitting the car and the wind outside and i could still hear him breathing and feel his little heart beating against my leg.

now, all i can think is that it just isn't fair even though i know there's not one fucking thing anyone could have done and all i want to do is blame someone even if it's myself and i know that that is just stupid and i'm going fucking INSANE because i just want the little fucker to run across my art pad. that's all i want. that's it.

[Triggar]

I feel so bad for you. I might even cry.

Call me if you want to chat, I'll PM you my number.

[oddfish]

i'm almost 21 years old and i still can't figure this shit out.

i mean, i know it was just a cat. it wasn't like, my dad or anything, but still. i loved Caligula. he was my homie. we rolled on some mofo's like whoompdie whoomp ***** what!

i mean, times when people just could all go fuck themselves and rot, he was there, walking under my hand so i'd pet him, and then arching his back and raising his ass to press it harder against my hand when i pet him. and if you pet his tail he'd roll over and grab his tail and then paw at you. like touching his tail meant it was automatically playtime.

and he bit and pawed and pounced and ambushed people from under furniture. i loved it. we'd coordinate complex attack patterns and execute them on Travis' friends. Cali was the coolest cat evar. sometimes he'd get really excited and go charging around the house like a maniac for no reason whatsoever. you'd just see a stark white flash go by and you knew he was going nuts.

three years.. that's all he got.

that's not enough.

and i feel so selfish for not wanting to give him up because i'm supposed to know he's in a better place but then, how the fuck do i know that?

what could have been better than where he was? what could've been better than me and him? i hate when people say that! when people say he's in a better place! FUCK YOU! you don't know that! he was happy with me! i was happy with HIM! what could be better than unconditional love and companionship? nothing. so fuck that philosophy. i don't care if it sounds selfish. maybe i AM getting too worked up over a pet, but he was a good pet. he was my friend. beleive it or not i don't have many friends, so it was nice to have one that i knew would never turn his back on me, even if he wasn't human. sometimes he seemed more human to me than my human friends.

three years. what kind of cruel thing is it to give someone something that makes them so happy and then take it away.

[Mr1337Duck]

I feel for you man. People shouldn't break out the better place stuff. Mourning occurs, and when someone is in that state, and for years later, they don't want their loved one to be in a better place, they want them to be with their owners. Nobody's gonna take offense if that's how you feel.

[Triggar]

He sounds like he was a kick ass motherfarker of a cat. He probably isn't somewhere better. He's probably in kitty afterlife, looking around thinking, 'This is the shit they give me for three good years on Earth?'. He's probably got a kitty dirty martini in one hand and a cigar in the other, scanning the place for a cute spayed kitten. No need to be a father at his age.

I'm so sorry oddfish. I hope I never feel what you're going through.

[Neon Apocalypse]

im sorry oddfish

i can imagine how cool he was

[Mr1337Duck]

I guess what I'm trying to say is:

When a man loses his wife or child, he isn't happy they're in a better place then, he wants them to be alive, back here with him. Pets are no exception, it's not selfish at all to want them to be alive, back with you.

[Triggar]

Because that way, you can do everything in your power to insure that they're happy, and taken care of. We don't know what's happening once they leave us.

[oddfish]

i just want my friend back. he was so annoying. he'd crawl in bed with me and move around and shift and shuffle and kick and squirm just to piss me off, i swear! and he knew that it drove me nuts to the point where i couldn't ignore him and we'd have to play or go eat, or go cruisin' the beach for hos (he'd sit on my shoulders and then jump down and attack jellyfish and shit. the little bastard helped me get more phone numbers haha..)

when i'd go surfing he'd go with me and he'd chill on the beach by my stuff and attack ghost crabs and ambush lizards. he was more of an outside cat than anything. he was my little white ninja.

i'd come back to the house and there'd be whole rows of dead animals that he'd just gone and killed and brought back like trophies. it always made me think of Predator. my little mass-murderer. Cali was the shit. figures... just take him away.

if i was busy on the computer or writing or something he'd jump on my shoulders and rub around my head and leave white fur all over the place. then the moron'd lose his grip and fall off of my shoulders and cling to my shirt with his claws. when he did that he always tried to make it seem like he'd MEANT to do it. like it was planned. he was alllllll about vanity. i bet he got laid a lot. there's quite a few cats around here. i'm sure the females all experienced Caligula at one point or another. hahahah..

damn. i really miss the little fucker... when i wake up tomorrow i'm gonna wonder where he is, i just know it, and then it's gonna dawn on me again... i don't want to go to sleep... i don't want to wake up without him. this whole summer was great because i spent it in the house with Trav and i got to spend the whole summer with Caligula.. Cali didn't really like anyone else that much.. he and i just seemed to work well together.. i'll never have another cat like him... this is just fucked up and i feel like fucking crying but i can't because i never do and i think if i did i'd probably choke or something but i want to do something so bad and if i don't i know i'm going to start hitting things.

[Triggar]

Cry and hit things, who cares? Your best friend, the little ball of fur who never asked anything of you other than to be fed and lavished, was taken away from you in the most fucked-up way.

The cat sounded so fucking cool. You took him to the beach? That's awesome, did he freak out at the water?

When did this happen?

[Kikinchikin]

:( I feel really bad for him. Sorry for your loss.

[oddfish]

Cry and hit things, who cares? Your best friend, the little ball of fur who never asked anything of you other than to be fed and lavished, was taken away from you in the most fucked-up way.

The cat sounded so fucking cool. You took him to the beach? That's awesome, did he freak out at the water?

When did this happen?


i took him to the beach almost all summer when i'd go surfing with Trav and Kyle and them.. we didn't surf much this summer tho cuz the waves weren't that good.. but, when they were, we were there. we're all pretty determined that we're gonna move out to california, hahaha..

anyways, i'd take him out there when i'd go surf-fishing and he'd attack my bait and anything i caught.. he didn't really mind the water all that much, though he did try to avoid it. Cali was hardxcore. he'd chase gulls and cranes and all that. he was great. he'd attack people and i'd have to go collect him, hahaha.

*sigh* and sometimes i'd come back to my stuff after surfing and he'd be there with a ghost crab hanging from his mouth by the claw. little psycho. i had to take him to the vet so many times for little cuts and stuff that worried me because he'd get attacked by multiple crabs, hahahaha. he was awesome..

sometimes he'd sleep on my board and get cat hair stuck in the wax. sometimes he'd bring half-alive lizards in the house and let them go just so he could chase them and then i'd have to shampoo the little lizard blood stains out of the carpet.

he'd eat parts of my sandwiches and dig around in grocery bags when i brought 'em home. he'd bug Kyle while he cooked. he'd attack Travis in the shower. He'd practically molest any girl i slept with. horny little bastard.

he was just a sweet cat. i miss him so much. it's only been a little more than a week... this isn't fair. i want him to come back but he won't... and everytime i realize this i just see the little guy breathing and looking at me... his little tail always wagged when he let me rub his stomach, but now it was just still.. he tried to grab my hand with his front paws but it must've hurt him too much cuz he gave up on that.. then he started to breath shorter and less... and his little heart was beating. and then it wasn't. and i couldn't feel his heart or see his little stomach rising and falling... i just kept petting him, though.. i told him to wake up a few times.. but i knew better.. he was such a pretty cat... he had bright blue eyes. what cat has bright blue eyes?? he did. they were closed.. i just wanted to kiss the poor guy on the head and have him wake up but he didn't and it wouldn't have worked anyways because he had to die for some reason... when you have something you care about that much it's always best to have it taken away from you.. that way you don't forget about how fucked up everything is.

well.. i'm done fucking whining about this.. it's got to be annoying the shit out of everyone here because it's annoying the shit out of me.. and, amity's here, so, i'm gonna go.. 'night guys.. thanks guys, for letting me rant.. i needed it.. but, i'm done now.. it does get old after a while, probably.

[Triggar]

Stfu, it isn't annoying anyone. If it is, I'll have Martyr ban them, the insensitive pricks.

Do Amity up the butt for us all. You'll feel better.

Isis just came by and weaved between my legs. I went to pick her up and kiss her - this thread has made me appreciate her that much more - but the little adolescent brat squeeked, bit my lip, stared me down, squeeked again, so I let her down. She scampered out of the room, her little hips swinging back and forth as she galloped away.

[Dharkbayne]

:(

[oddfish]

Stfu, it isn't annoying anyone. If it is, I'll have Martyr ban them, the insensitive pricks.

Do Amity up the butt for us all. You'll feel better.

Isis just came by and weaved between my legs. I went to pick her up and kiss her - this thread has made me appreciate her that much more - but the little adolescent brat squeeked, bit my lip, stared me down, squeeked again, so I let her down. She scampered out of the room, her little hips swinging back and forth as she galloped away.


hahahahahahaha!

Isis sounds cool. vicious little runt. she gets the Caligula seal of Coolness. :)

[Hezzy]

:(