Holy shit im shy.

[Darksim]

I dont understand why...but im shy as fuck. I dont think I was shy as a kid..I think I bit other kids when I was like 4, so I dont know. Soooo....Anyone else as shy as me? like shit, I cant even ask a girl out.

[Derfud]

I am shy most of the time, especially around someone I am attracted to.

[Darksim]

I forgot where you lived...Victoria?

[Derfud]

South of Vancouver, White Rock.

[Squeeky]

I can break anyone out of their shell. Come to PSU:MB and stick with Trig and I, we'll have you half naked, stoned, drunk, and partying like a fucking animal.

[martyr]

I can break anyone out of their shell. Come to PSU:MB and stick with Trig and I, we'll have you half naked, stoned, drunk, and partying like a fucking animal.

i didn't realize you were breaking infernus out of any shells at psuma

[Darksim]

well im not totally shelled in ya know. Havnt been drunk, high and half naked partying though :D (yet)


And im in Canada eh, so airfare to Cali or Florida will be $300...ehh It depends if its on the holidays.

[Smaug]

Havnt been drunk

There's your problem. Just get blitzed, and let it flow.

[Triggar]

No, you just need to get over it.

It's that simple.

Just get over it.

Realise that in all likelihood, people are not going to make fun of you or reject you, and even if they do, the hell with them. Who cares. No one's going to make fun of you or resent you for going out on a limb for any reason. And again, if anyone is, the hell with them.

So I repeat my advice. Just get over it. It really is that easy. The problem is all in your head.

[Pilgrim]

They all hate you and are really out to get you!!!!

Just kidding

I was shy as hell when I was in my teens as well. You'll either

a) Get over it

b) Discover the Joy of Liquid Courage

c) Stay shy and end up jerking off in your mom's basement at 35

So do what Trig said And just get over it!

Really not that hard... and you don't want to end up a drunk or blind do you?

[Derfud]

What about drunk and blind? :brow:

[DropShipEdward]

I can break anyone out of their shell. Come to PSU:MB and stick with Trig and I, we'll have you half naked, stoned, drunk, and partying like a fucking animal.

i'll hold you to that squeeky...

[Octavian]

Shy all my life, difficult meeting new people and talking to girls.

[Sputty]

Bah, I'd rather be shy than an overopinionated, loud, obnoxious ass, in real life of course. Can't speak for here of course

[Darksim]

Yea, Im getting over it..I figured out a while ago that, so what if I make a ass of my self, I dont really care what other think...But then again im still shy.


I wanna get sloshed! WOOOOOOOOOO!
(its not like I havnt had alchohol, I've been tipsy after drinking a bunch of champagne)

[Smaug]

its not like I havnt had alchohol, I've been tipsy after drinking a bunch of champagne

Whoa, you're such a rebel.

[JetRaiden]

If youre shy about asking a girl out (assuming you have a chance with her), just bite your lip and approach her, and let it out. You'll get a huge sense of relief afterwards, regardless of what she says.

[MrPaul]

I'm sly. Just remember, girls get shy too (seriously). If there's a girl that you like, and you suspect that she likes you, then don't worry about it. You've got nothing to lose, she says yes, wayhey, she says no, big deal, just means you can move on and not "obcess" about her.
"But if she liked me she'd have asked me out..." Not [neccesarily] true. Half the time I've found that girls are just as, if not more shy than guys when it comes to dating, and asking people out.

[ChewyLSB]

I guess you can call me "shy", although I prefer the term "introverted" or "anti-social". Take your pick.

I mean, I can still make friends, but I can really only become friends with other band losers and such. Such is life.

[ZeusCali]

I find I possess a level of shyness that doesn't envolve rejection. Well atleast not in the lateral current sense of at this momment some one says no. More like I'm unsure of my decisions and their active reprecutions. For example deciding which girl to go out with, what to do on a date. Or deciding which career I want to study up for.

But ontop of that I have a weird introverted complexes of my self image, in short low self-esteem. I always say sorry, either that or make a joke. I was picked on as a kid, I mean like there's the Boys, The Girls, and then there's zach. So nowadays alot of my actions, i'm not sure of. Nor am I sure if I am ugly, cute, handsome, or sexy.

One of my problems is I think to much or so I believe. If someone says I am handsome funny and smart... I write it off as politness.

I guess what I eally want is to be confident of all my actions and therefore I have to what... just live? I am already numb to negative critisism and name calling. What else can I do to "fix" my problem?


*P.S. Can you please correct my english. I don't write it aswell as I used to.
Thank You.

[Triggar]

although I prefer the term "anti-social".

Poor kid. (http://asperdis.org/)

[ObnoxiousFrog]

I was shy as fuck until today, last period photo class, the girl I sit near came up to me:

"Hey"

Me: "hey"

her: "my friend has a band, and-"

(teacher yells at us, we laugh a little and call him a douchebag)

her: "anyway, this friend of mine, her band is playing at the Grand Slam this weekend, and she needs some people to come, so..."

me: "alright, i don't have anything else to do friday. What kind of music do they play?"

her: "she says that its 'not EXACTLY hardcore'."

me: "haha, not EXACTLY."

her: "she says that the vocals are like Incubus, but the music is heavier."

me: "alright, I'll be there."

Just be yourself, all it is. Some people won't like you for who you are, but hey, you shouldn't try to please everyone, that makes you go crazy in the end.

[MrPaul]

I find I possess a level of shyness that doesn't envolve rejection. Well atleast not in the lateral current sense of at this momment some one says no. More like I'm unsure of my decisions and their active reprecutions. For example deciding which girl to go out with, what to do on a date. Or deciding which career I want to study up for.

But ontop of that I have a weird introverted complexes of my self image, in short low self-esteem. I always say sorry, either that or make a joke. I was picked on as a kid, I mean like there's the Boys, The Girls, and then there's zach. So nowadays alot of my actions, i'm not sure of. Nor am I sure if I am ugly, cute, handsome, or sexy.

One of my problems is I think to much or so I believe. If someone says I am handsome funny and smart... I write it off as politness.

Man, that is so me. But I tend to flip between super outgoing, to very introverted. I think I'm more outgoing than I used to be.

I guess all I can say is, relax. Put behind you what people used to say. If someone says something positive about you, accept it, revel in it. If you need to, you can remember them saying it if you get down. It sounds tsupid but some people find it really helps. :)

If you get to the stage where you think "too much," then just chill, and try to think of yourself floating in a big white room. Just floating. It really calms you down and if you do it right you can enter a near meditational state. That's not the way I stopped thinking too much, however. The way I'm taking takes a lot more effort and you really have to be 16 or under to take it; study physics etc at uni and learn about how things (the universe) works. Of course, you may not be thinking about the universe, if you're thinking about other people, you may want to take a short course, or even just read up on, in Social Studies or Psychology.

Just a couple of tips.

[internetn]

I was fuggin pimp in kindergarden (Im kinda shamed to admit that) and all was good for me up untill 4 grade... Well I kinda started turning into the bully type and a lot of little kids.. at the time liked me for that... My parents on the other hand didn't like picking me up from school early, thus they homeschooled me... for 4 fuckin years, there went middle school, (argueably the most influencial stages of a persons life) and smack dab into highschool...
Well the beginning of my 1st semester of my freshman year was so horrible, I knew only one person,(or could only really remeber one, curse my bad memory) and it was hell untill about 4 weeks before christmas... Then I found out that this girl had a crush on me since the 2 grade and we went out.. for 2 weeks.. I later found out I had a problem with commitment.. so my next girlfriend lasted about 2-3 weeks and most of the ones after that were the same... then came the summer... which was prob the worst time in my life.. I went out with this girl the hole summer... She made me a nervous wreck, I felt like I was married.... So I broke up with her at the beginning of my soph. year.. prob was that she was friends with like all the hottest girls in school, and so they thought I was a jerk.. well I decided not to go out with another girl untill either I pass my physics class... or I get my license.. and well My parents hate me and wouldnt let me get my license, and I failed physics (BTW they made me take it in the 10 grade..... crazy!).. So I get my license in about three more months (...2 months before I turn 18...grr) and Im still not passing physics... But hell Im not anti social... but I have developed a few enemies cause I wouldnt drink with them... I got a career path.. and I did some crazy things when I got drunk so... the two don;t mix... Anyways dont care about what people think of you, take a baseball bat to the world for all I care... just find some random girl, whisper romantic things into her ear... have fun and live your life!! (PS: Dump her in like a month, or else she will expect presents in such, just a general thing)

[Rbstr]

I am shy most of the time, especially around someone I am attracted to.
yeah, me to, but mainly i just don't initiate conversations I need to get invited/pulled in somehow.

Except here, talking on PSU about stuff i think has helped my allowin social interation without shyness it's like a buffer.

It's wierd how the internet strips almost every possible discriminatory/embarasing/stereotypey thing except illiteracy.

[Biohazzard56]

Triggar is 110% right, I had to get over my shyness a couple years ago. Simply put, ask a girl to straddle you. :brow:

[Kyonye]

i'm never shy...anymore atleast. i noticed it killed life in general to not be able to talk to people and meet new people. but i lost my shyness when i was like 10 so i've been very social every since.

just go out and do it, the more you wait, the worse it gets....so get your ass out and just start talking to people. be yourself, if they don't like it, fuck 'em...if they do, hang out with them more.

[Wraithlord]

No, you just need to get over it.

It's that simple.

Just get over it.

Realise that in all likelihood, people are not going to make fun of you or reject you, and even if they do, the hell with them. Who cares. No one's going to make fun of you or resent you for going out on a limb for any reason. And again, if anyone is, the hell with them.

So I repeat my advice. Just get over it. It really is that easy. The problem is all in your head.

Its not that easy.
I suppose that anyone who is an extrovert like yourself would have problems seeing why asocial individuals feel the way they do, I understand what hes saying perfectly, I've been "shy" my whole life, and have been told in fewer or more words that same advice, it isnt that easy trig, some people are just hardwired to be "shy", its not a fear of being made fun of or anything ridiculous like that, its just that being all outgoing and cheery to everyone has the same appeal to me as skinning my genitals while being raped by a 300 pound hells angel. Oh yeah, getting drunk does work too :)

[Biohazzard56]

The way I personally got over my shyness is having alot of friends and just talking to a whole bunch of girls. Then there was a girl named Samantha that I liked and I asked her out, which was the toughest part. She said yes and we went out for about two months and after that I wasnt shy anymore. If you like a girl your attraction to her will overcome your shyness.

And the whole straddle me thing was a pickup line of my friends, funny story, I may post it sometime.

[AztecWarrior]

"I'm not anti-social, I just hate you." is my credo when dealing with most people from my generation, i.e. ghetto thugz.

I am shy on top of it, but won't let that prevent me from doing what I want- though it is hard to overcome that barrier.

[Triggar]

I was shy for years. YEARS. When I was little, I used to go completely beet red whenever someone talked to me. I used to freak out wondering if they were wondering what I was thinking. It used to really freak me out.

I know how you feel. I wasn't born an extrovert. I still don't consider myself one now, I just don't care either way.

[ChewyLSB]

Here's the thing though - I don't mind being an introvert. I really don't want to get into a high school relationship, since I know it won't last beyond high school, so I figured there's really no point in becoming an extrovert for now. I mean, I still have friends, and I'm fine with the friends I have now.

[Bighoss]

Okay here is the shallow solution...If you have overall confidence in yourself then you won't be shy. In order to be confident you must do away with your insecurities. If your insecurities are physical and fixable then fix them. Have bad acne? Take care of it, overweight? Take care of it, Gross teeth? take care of it. The less you have to worry about somone physically judging you the more outgoing you can be in a conversation. Some people are just naturally confident, it's one of this things you have or don't. If you don't just improve yourself. Isolate a flaw of your's and fix it. One less thing to worry about.

[Darksim]

YEa, well im not that shy, I dont go red when I tlak to people, I tlak to alot of people all time. Eh, I guess im semi-shiy. I have seen shyer. (or shier or shyir?)

[Ivan]

There are several reasons I think I have a hard time talking to people.

First, I was always shy in the sense as I�m not comfortable with my physical appearance, and I �think too much� into things as stated before. I think about what I�m going to say, and then I think about what their reply would be, then my reply and so forth. By the time I�ve talked myself out of even starting the conversation.

I usually have to be pulled into conversations. It takes me a while to warm up to people with the few exceptions. My friend�s current girlfriend is one expectation. For some reason I was comfortable talking with her the first time I met her. My friend was the one who pointed it out to me. I didn�t even notice.

But the second reason for my shyness would probably be the death of several loved ones in a relatively short period of time. I�ve grown sick of talking to people after that cause I can just see and feel the uncomfortableness in them while talking to me. I don�t blame them really. It makes me uncomfortable too.

I think if anything at all; all the deaths have made me a bitter person really. Because now, I could care less if you want to just make small talk with me and tell me how bad your day was. And I could care less to tell you how my day was because I know it don�t really have an effect on your life nor does your day have an effect on mine. So why even talk about it?

I guess what I mean if that didn�t come out as clear as I want it to is, I know you don�t really care about my life cause I don�t really care about yours. So I have nothing good to talk about. Thus I feel it�s better not to say anything at all.

I have nothing interesting to talk about if I don�t know you all that well. And that�s my problem with warming up to people.

[_-Gunslinger-_]

There are several reasons I think I have a hard time talking to people.

First, I was always shy in the sense as I�m not comfortable with my physical appearance, and I �think too much� into things as stated before. I think about what I�m going to say, and then I think about what their reply would be, then my reply and so forth. By the time I�ve talked myself out of even starting the conversation.

I usually have to be pulled into conversations. It takes me a while to warm up to people with the few exceptions. My friend�s current girlfriend is one expectation. For some reason I was comfortable talking with her the first time I met her. My friend was the one who pointed it out to me. I didn�t even notice.

But the second reason for my shyness would probably be the death of several loved ones in a relatively short period of time. I�ve grown sick of talking to people after that cause I can just see and feel the uncomfortableness in them while talking to me. I don�t blame them really. It makes me uncomfortable too.

I think if anything at all; all the deaths have made me a bitter person really. Because now, I could care less if you want to just make small talk with me and tell me how bad your day was. And I could care less to tell you how my day was because I know it don�t really have an effect on your life nor does your day have an effect on mine. So why even talk about it?

I guess what I mean if that didn�t come out as clear as I want it to is, I know you don�t really care about my life cause I don�t really care about yours. So I have nothing good to talk about. Thus I feel it�s better not to say anything at all.

I have nothing interesting to talk about if I don�t know you all that well. And that�s my problem with warming up to people.


What a dreadful outlook on life. In response to your last statement, "I have nothign interesting...", How are you going to find out what to talk to that person about if you wont make conversation with them? Also I believe you have a commitment issue, probably because of the velocity of deaths in your family. When you talk to someone and learn about them, and they learn about you, there is a mutual investment. You both have taken time to learn something about the other person, and now you have grown closer. From what I read, you dont really want to invest in someone else and thus they have very little opportunity to invest in you.

We all view the world through ourselves, when we try to figure out what someone else is thinking or fealing we project what we would think or feal if we were in thier situation. I would recomend not trying to guess and simply ask them what they think or feal about whatever. This builds the "relationship" and you will know what they are thinking or fealing. Also this builds trust, what we think or feal is one of the last private things we have in our lives. Its the only place where we can almost 100% gaurantee that no one will know anything about, if we dont want them too. So in order to give someone access to our opinions takes a level of trust, depending on what there person asks, the more trust is needed. Almost like a faction gain in an mmo lol.

[Everay]

eh, since were all talking about ourselves, me, im content not really know any kids at my school, only time i open my mouth in my A+ class is to say something factual, at least, that is unless im asked a question about myself, otherwise i dont open my mouth, not because im afraid to, but because i dont care to.

Ivan, while your outlook is that of a realist, you gotta agree with me, that sometimes you gotta talk for the fuck of it.

[Wraithlord]

I think my "shyness" stems more from the fact that whenever I actually engage in conversation with someone I somehow end up making them look stupid/inept/ridiculous or making myself look like a/n asshole/elitist/psycotic

[Angel_of_Death]

I don't really think there is any solution to sto being shy, save alcohol, and it won't always be there. Just be yourself if people don't like you for that nothing you can do.

I'm an extrovert. I find it real easy to start conversations with anyone really, and I'm not afraid to voice my opinion or my feelings for someone. It's hardwired in to you, nothing you can do to change it really.

[Infernus]

I am shy most of the time, especially around someone I am attracted to.


This is me too really...

I'm shy around a person I'm attracted to, extremely... I just lose what I'm going to say and just go blank.

Around my friends, I'm the complete opposite - I have a lot of friends, I am the major social creature when it comes to my 'inner circle'.

Most of the time though, I'd be completely content to not talk at all, shadowy and ponderous for teh win.

EDIT: And most of the time it would seem people are content not talking to me... so its not really shyness, its salutory neglect.

[Baneblade]

I used to be shy, then I realised I'm just an asshole.

[Ivan]

eh, since were all talking about ourselves, me, im content not really know any kids at my school, only time i open my mouth in my A+ class is to say something factual, at least, that is unless im asked a question about myself, otherwise i dont open my mouth, not because im afraid to, but because i dont care to.

Ivan, while your outlook is that of a realist, you gotta agree with me, that sometimes you gotta talk for the fuck of it.
I really didn't have a bad time in school cause, well being with the same poeple day after day for years was long enough time to warm up to them.

Like I said in another similer thread a little while ago, I was friends with almost all if not all the hotties in school, just was ended up being too close of a friend to ask any of them out.:shrug:

But know that I've been out of school for a few years I just have a small close few friends still around.

[internetn]

I have nothing interesting to talk about if I don�t know you all that well.

Well usually if I have nothing interesting to talk about... I make up totaly far fetched storys, its so damn funny!

And another thing, one way to overcome shyness, is to be able to laugh at yourself... If you make alot of mistakes, learn how to play them off, don't get red in the face dont get angry, laugh for god's sake... Oh and learn how to make speeches... I love making speeches, and that really kill shyness... specialy when the appluad you.. I do them in ROTC alot... :D Becuase Im the leader!... (Kinda have to when you got the... uh less fortunate... or peeps from the ghetto that think ROTC means.. Rest Openly in The Class)

[Ivan]

Well usually if I have nothing interesting to talk about... I make up totaly far fetched storys, its so damn funny!

And another thing, one way to overcome shyness, is to be able to laugh at yourself... If you make alot of mistakes, learn how to play them off, don't get red in the face dont get angry, laugh for god's sake... Oh and learn how to make speeches... I love making speeches, and that really kill shyness... specialy when the appluad you.. I do them in ROTC alot... :D Becuase Im the leader!... (Kinda have to when you got the... uh less fortunate... or peeps from the ghetto that think ROTC means.. Rest Openly in The Class)
I don't like to make up stories because I know guys who do that and then they get caught up in them and don't just admit that they were lieing.

With my friends I'm able to laugh at myself but with someone I don't know I try not to cause I don't want to seem corny. Or trying to be funny for attention.

I do make speeches. About once a month or two in front of about anywhere from 40 to 60 people. I feel like I'm going to puke every time I do it. The hardest part of speeches for me is not the speech it's self, it's walking up to the stage and podium and then walking away. Don't know why. Maybe because my mind is so set on the speech it self during the speech that I'm not thinking what people might be thinking about me then.

[internetn]

I don't like to make up stories because I know guys who do that and then they get caught up in them and don't just admit that they were lieing.

Well they know I'm making up the story's, thats whats so damn funny... I am always uneasy, its just, If you believe that you are good, or that you could do good, then why do you need to be shy about the matter... Focus and smile, to important things... Some people think your cocky if you smile before or after speeches, but thats better than looking like you've done a bad job..

PS: Why do you got to talk in front of so many people so often?

PS,PS: You could always try the adolf way to make a speech, start low and quiet... Then grad get louder.. till eventually you break out in a sweat and are yelling, that whips the crowd up in a frenzy!

[Bighoss]

if you have a hard time with getting a conversationg going just remeber people LOVE to talk about themselves. So work with that, if they mention some sport or hobby they do start praising them and asking them questions about it etc. That's the best way save a crappy conversation.

[Sputty]

My mom called me anti social on the phone(I hope he's not anti social or I'm worried about him becoming anti social is the context)
Perhaps she's right
I do pretend to be asleep to avoid people and listen to them when they think I can't hear them

[Triggar]

That's not anti-social, that's elitist and nosy :p

That being said, I approve.