Marlboro Man!!
2003-03-01, 12:40 PM
I found this hanging on my fridge, its been there for quite some time(date 11/8/00) and i thought it was somewhat funny! enjoy!
p.s. its kinda long but plz read!
ANSWERS TO THE PREVERBAL QUESTION: WHY DID CHICKENS CROSS THE ROAD????
Al Gore:I fight for the chickens and i am fighting for the chickens right now. I will not give up on the chickens crossing the road! I will fight for the chickens and I will not disappoint them.
George W. Bush :I dont believe we need to get the chickens across the road. I say give the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs to let go of strangling the chickens so they can get across the road
Senator Lieberman :I believe that every chicken has the right to worship their god in their own way. Crossing the road is a spiritual journey and no chicken should be denied the right to cross the road in their own way.
Dick Cheney : Chickens are BIG-TIME becuase they have wings. They could fly if they wanted to . Chickens dont want to cross the road. They dont need help crossing the road. In fact, Im not interested in crossing the road myself.
Ralph Nader :Chickens are misled in believing there is a road by the evil tiremakers. Chickens arent ignorant, but our society pays tiremakers to create the need for these roads and the lures chickens into believing there is an advantage to crossing them. Down with the roads, up with the chickens.
Pat Buchanan : To steal a job from a decent , hardworking American.
Jerry Falwell :Becuase the chicken was gay! Isnt it obvious? cant you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." Thats what "they" call it-the "other side." Yes my friends , that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out theis abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side" That chicken should not be free to cross the road. Its as plain and simple as that.
Dr. Seuss : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?Yes! the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, Ive not been told!
Ernest Hemingway To die. In the rain.
Martin Luther King, Jr :I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross without having their motives called into question.
Grandpa :In my day , we didnt ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road , and that was good enough for us.
Aristotle :It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
Karl Marx :It was a historical Inevitability.
Saddam Hussein :This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping nerve gas on it.
Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the roadrevelas your underlying sexual insecurity.
Bill Gates :I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not only cross roads, but lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance yoru checkbook- and internet explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
Albert Einstein Did the chicken cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
Bill Clinton :I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. what do you mean by "chicken?" could you define "chicken" please?
Captain James T. Kirk: to boldy go where no chicken has gone before.
Colonel Sanders: I missed one?
sorry for the colors that are strenious on the eye, i really do apologize but i wanted to make sure it just didnt all kinda clump together. thank you for reading hope you enjoyed!
DOWN WITH ROADS , UP WITH CHICKENS!!
p.s. its kinda long but plz read!
ANSWERS TO THE PREVERBAL QUESTION: WHY DID CHICKENS CROSS THE ROAD????
Al Gore:I fight for the chickens and i am fighting for the chickens right now. I will not give up on the chickens crossing the road! I will fight for the chickens and I will not disappoint them.
George W. Bush :I dont believe we need to get the chickens across the road. I say give the road to the chickens and let them decide. The government needs to let go of strangling the chickens so they can get across the road
Senator Lieberman :I believe that every chicken has the right to worship their god in their own way. Crossing the road is a spiritual journey and no chicken should be denied the right to cross the road in their own way.
Dick Cheney : Chickens are BIG-TIME becuase they have wings. They could fly if they wanted to . Chickens dont want to cross the road. They dont need help crossing the road. In fact, Im not interested in crossing the road myself.
Ralph Nader :Chickens are misled in believing there is a road by the evil tiremakers. Chickens arent ignorant, but our society pays tiremakers to create the need for these roads and the lures chickens into believing there is an advantage to crossing them. Down with the roads, up with the chickens.
Pat Buchanan : To steal a job from a decent , hardworking American.
Jerry Falwell :Becuase the chicken was gay! Isnt it obvious? cant you people see the plain truth in front of your face? The chicken was going to the "other side." Thats what "they" call it-the "other side." Yes my friends , that chicken is gay. And, if you eat that chicken, you will become gay too. I say we boycott all chickens until we sort out theis abomination that the liberal media whitewashes with seemingly harmless phrases like "the other side" That chicken should not be free to cross the road. Its as plain and simple as that.
Dr. Seuss : Did the chicken cross the road? Did he cross it with a toad?Yes! the chicken crossed the road, but why it crossed, Ive not been told!
Ernest Hemingway To die. In the rain.
Martin Luther King, Jr :I envision a world where all chickens will be free to cross without having their motives called into question.
Grandpa :In my day , we didnt ask why the chicken crossed the road. Someone told us that the chicken crossed the road , and that was good enough for us.
Aristotle :It is the nature of chickens to cross the road.
Karl Marx :It was a historical Inevitability.
Saddam Hussein :This was an unprovoked act of rebellion and we were quite justified in dropping nerve gas on it.
Freud: The fact that you are at all concerned that the chicken crossed the roadrevelas your underlying sexual insecurity.
Bill Gates :I have just released eChicken 2000, which will not only cross roads, but lay eggs, file your important documents, and balance yoru checkbook- and internet explorer is an inextricable part of eChicken.
Albert Einstein Did the chicken cross the road, or did the road move beneath the chicken?
Bill Clinton :I did not cross the road with THAT chicken. what do you mean by "chicken?" could you define "chicken" please?
Captain James T. Kirk: to boldy go where no chicken has gone before.
Colonel Sanders: I missed one?
sorry for the colors that are strenious on the eye, i really do apologize but i wanted to make sure it just didnt all kinda clump together. thank you for reading hope you enjoyed!
DOWN WITH ROADS , UP WITH CHICKENS!!