I am convinced my school is retarded

Dharkbayne · 2004-05-10, 11:10 PM

Okay, I'm in the computer lab at school today, and these 2 other jackasses, who for protective purposes, shall be named Octavian, and Lee, who know NOTHING about computers, are saying that they are hackers, and whatnot, and we're standing next to an old ass PC (6-8 years old) with no case.

Octavian: Where's the motherboard?

Me: Uh.... it's that big thing in the back

Octavian: I knew that, I was just seeing if you did

Me: Mmhmm

Octavian: That graphics card doesn't look very advanced

Me: Show me which one's the graphics card

**Octavian points to the sound card**

Me: Wrong.

**Octavian points to the hard drive

Me: Wrong again. **points to the gfx card**

Octavian: Oh, I'm not used to computers of this syntax protocol

Me: Ahh, are you experienced with jiggawat based computers?

Lee: It's not "jiggawat" stupid. IT'S GIGGAWAT.

**Trying to hold in the laughs**

Me: jiggawats are smaller giggawats

Lee: Oh yeah, I forgot

Me: How many jiggawats are in a giggawat?

Lee: Uhh... hmm... uhh... **mumbling to self for about 30 seconds**

Me: Yes?

Lee: A hundred?

Me: No, that's a jiggabyte

Lee: No, that's called a giggawat

Me: Nu-uh!

Lee: YEAH HUH, I KNOW ALOT MORE ABOUT COMPUTERS THAN YOU, I MADE A VIDEO GAME!

Me: You ... made a video game?

Lee: YEAH, I MADE MY OWN VIDEO GAME IN TONY HAWK UNDERGROUND! AND I HACKED A GAME TOO!

Me: Oh really? You did? Which one?

Lee: STARCRAFT! I HACKED IT SO I COULD SEE THE MAP!

Me:

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At this point, I couldn't help it, and I had to walk away.

1024 · 2004-05-10, 11:13 PM

Darksim · 2004-05-10, 11:13 PM

You MORON! That IS a giggawatt! *Slap*

Biohazzard56 · 2004-05-10, 11:13 PM

Its called; Esc, click options, uncheck fog of war, click ok.

Your School has issues Dhark. I hate it when teachers call the case the CPU to keep it simple, why dont you just tell them what it is instead of making it complicated later on. It annoys the hell ouf of me when they are like "The monitor is on top of the CPU".

EarlyDawn · 2004-05-10, 11:14 PM

"It's a Jiggabyte, I swear to god!"

Rbstr · 2004-05-10, 11:16 PM

Yeah i find it very dumb when somebody calles a the case a CPU. Even my programing teacehr does it, but she doesn't acctualy know how to program either, she just gives us a text book to read and yells at us for being off task

Biohazzard56 · 2004-05-10, 11:18 PM

Originally Posted by Rbstr

Yeah i find it very dumb when somebody calles a the case a CPU. Even my programing teacehr does it, but she doesn't acctualy know how to program either, she just gives us a text book to read and yells at us for being off task

Reminds me of the time, I was talking about programming with the teacher and some kid says "Basic isnt that the you use to pay for groceries with?"

Dharkbayne · 2004-05-10, 11:19 PM

Originally Posted by Biohazzard56

"Basic isnt that the you use to pay for groceries with?"

That isn't even a coherent sentence.

Biohazzard56 · 2004-05-10, 11:28 PM

Originally Posted by Dharkbayne

That isn't even a coherent sentence.

My Typing is fucked tonight, I meant to type

Basic isnt that the thing you use to Pay for Groceries with.

Corrosion · 2004-05-10, 11:27 PM

Originally Posted by Rbstr

Yeah i find it very dumb when somebody calles a the case a CPU. Even my programing teacehr does it, but she doesn't acctualy know how to program either, she just gives us a text book to read and yells at us for being off task

My local computer parts store calls the comp the "CPU". For example, when the put a pic of a monitor and the computer itself they put a caption that says: CPU ONLY.

EineBeBoP · 2004-05-10, 11:20 PM

I knew a few people like that.

AztecWarrior · 2004-05-10, 11:23 PM

Tell them this: (Bash quote #22202)

The_Fur: where do i fail again?

BadMojo: First off, you're the product of a failed abortion. Then your mother failed to drown you properly, only enhancing your retardation. Then you failed to develop inter-personal skills, a sense of a humour, and functioning testicles. After that, you completely failed to "have sex" or what I like to call "fucking." After which, you failed to enhance your brain to a proper level.

BadMojo: Then, you failed to make sensible arguements, failed to make funny statements, failed to win, and invariably you will try to shoot yourself in the skull and fail at that too, whereupon you will accidentally shoot two house cats and a small schoolgirl.

BadMojo: Then you will fail to make a logical case in court, where you will fail to be found innocent, and you will go to prison, where the only thing you will succeed at is being jail raped and then murdered by a fatman

BadMojo: Okay, let me rephrase: you will fail to properly protect your anus from a fatman in prison, and you will fail to have a knife-proof head, directly resulting in your subsequent failure to live

BadMojo: whereupon your organs will be donated to science, where your heart will fail, killing a small child, your lungs will fail, killing an elderly man, your liver will fail, killing a recovering alcoholic, and your kidneys will fail, making somebody pee everywhere

Everay · 2004-05-11, 02:17 AM

i suppose they think CPU stands for ComPUter or something, i dunno. mabey they are just fuck ups.

Ivan · 2004-05-11, 02:42 AM

Originally Posted by Everay

i suppose they think CPU stands for ComPUter or something, i dunno. mabey they are just fuck ups.

Yeah that's what most people call computers. It pisses me off to.

I wonder how pissed off Hamma gets at work when he get calls like that?

ViperGTS · 2004-05-11, 07:45 AM

Wow. You should see my computer applications teacher. He tries to make people belive he knows more than some of the students...when he dosnt. He had no fucking idea what a usb port was last year...