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Old 2004-06-01, 07:24 AM   [Ignore Me] #1
OfaLoaf
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The FDA gets realistic.

Originally Posted by Email I got from a friend
Due to increasing product liability litigation, American liquor
manufacturers have accepted the FDA's suggestion that the following
warning labels be placed immediately on all containers:

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may leave you wondering what the
hell happened to your bra.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you are
whispering when you are not.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is a major factor in dancing like a
retard.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to tell your friends
over and over again that you love them.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to think you can sing.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe that
ex-lovers are really dying for you to telephone them at four in the
morning.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you can
logically converse with members of the opposite sex without spitting.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may make you think you have
mystical Kung Fu powers, resulting in you getting your ass kicked.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause you to roll over in the
morning and see something really scary.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol is the leading cause of inexplicable
rug burns on the forehead, knees and lower back.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may create the illusion that you
are tougher, smarter, faster and better looking than most people.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe you are
invisible.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may lead you to believe people are
laughing WITH you.

WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause a disturbance in the
time-space continuum, whereby gaps of time may seem to literally disappear.
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Old 2004-06-01, 07:28 AM   [Ignore Me] #2
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Ugh... those bring back some bad memories.
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Old 2004-06-01, 07:42 AM   [Ignore Me] #3
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Originally Posted by TekDragon
Ugh... those bring back some bad memories.
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Old 2004-06-01, 12:40 PM   [Ignore Me] #4
Dharkbayne
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Originally Posted by TekDragon
Ugh... those bring back some bad memories.

"im sottttttttryyuuuuuuuuuuuu"

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Old 2004-06-01, 12:44 PM   [Ignore Me] #5
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Old 2004-06-02, 12:10 AM   [Ignore Me] #6
TekDragon
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Originally Posted by Dharkbayne
"im sottttttttryyuuuuuuuuuuuu"
Omg, how do you still remember that? Your worse than Squeeky. I hate you.
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Old 2004-06-02, 03:10 AM   [Ignore Me] #7
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Originally Posted by TekDragon
Omg, how do you still remember that? Your worse than Squeeky. I hate you.
Not too long ago someone linked the thread. It was a funnay read.

I was thinking it - Dharkbayne typed it.
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Old 2004-06-02, 07:01 AM   [Ignore Me] #8
TekDragon
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Originally Posted by SDM
Not too long ago someone linked the thread. It was a funnay read.

I was thinking it - Dharkbayne typed it.


I still can't even look at orange juice w/out getting quesy
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Old 2004-06-01, 07:48 AM   [Ignore Me] #9
Ivan
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Originally Posted by Email I got from a friend
WARNING: The consumption of alcohol may cause pregnancy.
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Old 2004-06-01, 01:15 PM   [Ignore Me] #10
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Warning: Alcohol consumption may make you believe you have a snake in your pants and you may rip off your genitals to stop it
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Old 2004-06-01, 02:07 PM   [Ignore Me] #11
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That only happened to me once.
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Old 2004-06-01, 05:28 PM   [Ignore Me] #12
JetRaiden
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is that real?
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Old 2004-06-01, 05:36 PM   [Ignore Me] #13
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Originally Posted by Sputty
Warning: Alcohol consumption may make you believe you have a snake in your pants and you may rip off your genitals to stop it


ouch.
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Old 2004-06-01, 09:19 PM   [Ignore Me] #14
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lol I can relate to at least 4-5 of those from a few weeks ago
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Old 2004-06-02, 03:05 AM   [Ignore Me] #15
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The Flash versions of some of the above warnings
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