A tech support request

[Happy lil Elf]

Found this mildy amusing and considering the techical geekiness of many on this board I thought I'd share

Dear Tech Support:

Last year I upgraded from Boyfriend 5.0 to Husband 1.0 and noticed a slowdown in over-all performance, particularly in the flower and jewelry application that had operated flawlessly under Boyfriend 5.0.

In addition, Husband 1.0 uninstalled many other valuable programs, such as Romance 9.5 and Personal Attention 6.5, but installed undesirable programs such as NFL 5.0 and NBA 3.0. And now Conversation 1.5 no longer runs and House Cleaning 2.6 simply crashes the system.

I've tried running Nagging 5.3 to fix these problems but to no avail. What can I do?

Signed,
Desperate

(And the reply...)

Dear Desperate:
First keep in mind; Boyfriend 5.0 is an entertainment package while Husband 1.0 is an operating system. Try entering the command C:\I THOUGHT YOU LOVED ME and download Tears 6.2 to install Guilt 3.0.

If all works as designed, Husband 1.0 should then automatically run the applications Jewelry 2.0 and Flowers 3.5. But remember, overuse can cause Husband 1.0 to default to Grumpy Silence 2.5, Happy Hour 7.0, or Beer 6.1. Beer 6.1 is a very bad program that will create Snoringloudly.wav files. Whatever you do, DO NOT install Mother-in-law 1.0 or reinstall another boyfriend program. These are not supported applications and will crash Husband 1.0.

In summary, Husband 1.0 is a great program, but it does have a limited memory and cannot learn new applications quickly. You might consider additional software to improve memory and performance. I personally recommend Hot Food 3.0 and Lingerie 6.9.

Good Luck,
Tech Support

[Squeeky]

Me, Manitou, And Hamma we're joking about this a few months ago in IRC. I basically said i hated the Girlfriend 1.0 expansion, and mani told me to quit whining until i got the Wife 5.0, Children 3.0, and Job expansions.

[Ait'al]

I dont get women. Why would you want to be romanced after you get married? Thats when you should be just spending all day together, now that you live together, and haveing sex all day. I always thought you should get all the romance desires out of the way when your dating, and then get married when youve delt with all those desires and just want to be together?

Thats funny though. The tech support for marriage is better than marriage counseling. lol

[Hamma]

[Ait'al]

Hamma:

huh?

[Happy lil Elf]

I dont get women why would you want to be romanced after you get married? thats when you should be just spending all day together now that you live together and haveing sex all day. I always thought you should get all the romance desires out of the way when your dating, and then get married when youve delt with all those desires and just want to be together?

Bachelor for life then I take it?

[Ait'al]

No, i just like very intimate relationships with people ive known along time.

Ok, maybe im contradicting myself a little here.

[Squick]

I think he just said married couples have sex all day long...

Can I get the a copy of the book that says that? I need to show that to someone