Top 5 most feared questions by men.

[Giovanni]

Here you will find 5 questions that married men, or just men in relationships, fear. Proper awnsers will be given.

Question 1: "What are you thinking about?"

The proper answer to this, of course, is: "I'm sorry if I have been a bit pensive darling. I was just reflecting on what a warm, wonderful,thoughtful, caring, intelligent woman you are, and how lucky I am to have met you."

Inappropriate awnsers would include:

• Nothing
• Football
• Any other woman
• How fat you are
• How would I spend the insurance money if you died

Perhaps the best response to this question was offered by Al Bundy, who once told Peg: "If I wanted you to know what I was thinking, I would be talking to you."

Question 2: "Do you love me?"

The proper response is: "YES" or, if you feel a more detailed answer is necessary: "Yes, dear."

Inappropriate responses include:

• Oh yeah! Shit loads!
• Would it make you feel better if I said yes?
• Depends on what you mean by love
• Does it really matter?
• Uh?

Question 3: "Do I look fat?"

The correct answer is an emphatic: "Of course not!!"

Among the incorrect answers are:

• Compared to what?
• I wouldn't call you fat, but you're not exactly thin.
• No more then usual!
• A little extra weight looks good on you.
• I've seen fatter.
• Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question 4: "Do you think she is prettier than me?"

Once again, the proper response is an emphatic: "Of course not!!"

Incorrect responses include:

• Yes, but you have a better personality
• Not prettier, but definitely thinner
• Not as pretty as you when you were her age
• Define "pretty"
• Could you repeat the question? I was just thinking about how I would spend the insurance money if you died.

Question 5: "What would you do if I died?"

A definite no-win question. (The real answer of course is "Buy a Ferrari and a boat".)

No matter how you answer this, be prepared for at least an hour of follow-up questions.




That's about it, add your own if you wish!

Note: I was bored as hell.

[Squeeky]

Whenever my girlfriend talks back to me, I slap her across the mouf and I'm like:

"Bitch, speak when spoken to. Go make me some food."

And then I have a spaghetti dinner.

[Giovanni]

Originally Posted by Squeeky

Whenever my girlfriend talks back to me, I slap her across the mouf and I'm like:

"Bitch, speak when spoken to. Go make me some food."

And then I have a spaghetti dinner.

[LimpBIT]

Question 6: "Why do you always take a shower as soon as you get home?"

Correct Answer: Because I want to smell good for a long night of cuddling with you(Be sure to smile).

Incorrect Answers:

• "Because I need to wash the smell of my secretary off me"
• "I needed to jack off.... sex with you is just nausiating nowa"
• "My nuts really smelled like girls perfume for some reason"
• "The blood on my hands was starting to dry"
• *Run out door*

[Infernus]

Originally Posted by LimpBIT

Question 6: "Why do you always take a shower as soon as you get home?"

Correct Answer: Because I want to smell good for a long night of cuddling with you(Be sure to smile).

Incorrect Answers:

• "Because I need to wash the smell of my secretary off me"
• "I needed to jack off.... sex with you is just nausiating nowa"
• "My nuts really smelled like girls perfume for some reason"
• "The blood on my hands was starting to dry"
• *Run out door*

Incorrect Answer:

• "The bathroom door locks!"

[Hamma]

[OneManArmy]

http://www.break.com/index/what_guys...thinking2.html

[Giovanni]

[Peacemaker]

That would be very very disturbing if someone acctualy said that to a girls parents. It would still be disturbing if they even thought it. Still funny as hell.

[LimpBIT]

Omg

[Rbstr]

http://www.xkcd.com/

[Peacemaker]

Rob. That comic. It is my new god.

[Rbstr]

Glad I can be a comic-vangelist

[Lartnev]

The church of stickmen?

[MattxMosh]

I always use the wrong answers, but my wife is different than most women, and gets a good laugh out of it.

But if ignore her the slightest bit I am in for it.