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Old 2004-11-28, 12:38 AM   [Ignore Me] #76
ObnoxiousFrog
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OK, wait...

Why does any of this matter at all, allow me to remind you that this is a SATIRICAL THREAD PERTAINING TO PENILE MAGNITUDE.
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Old 2004-11-28, 12:48 AM   [Ignore Me] #77
Octavian
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Mai hoovercraft iz fuul uf eelz
Bit too much Fark for you.
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:09 AM   [Ignore Me] #78
Firefly
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Originally Posted by firecrackerNC
How come you stare at old guy penises in locker rooms is a better question.
Yeah because surreptitiously glancing at a naked man's groin makes you gay. I'm comfortable around virtually anyone, and am absolutely secure in my sexuality, so nude people and their dangling participles or retracted clauses don't bother me.

I think it's only homophobes who have a problem and do that "I'm going to walk around staring at the ceiling so I don't see any cock" move.
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Last edited by Firefly; 2004-11-28 at 01:11 AM.
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:09 AM   [Ignore Me] #79
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ObFrog rules. Thats it. I try to stay away from making any insult to him, because if I do, there would be about 5 people here in his defense, right every-one of my wrongs.

ObFrog is the modern Jesus
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:11 AM   [Ignore Me] #80
AztecWarrior
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Originally Posted by Firefly
Yeah because surreptitiously glancing at a naked man's groin makes you gay.
Locker Room- "Oh shit, that guy was nude."

= Not gay.

Locker Room- hiding in the corner to stare at penis-

= gay.

I'm pretty sure he was there to use the facilities, not stare at other men.
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:18 AM   [Ignore Me] #81
Octavian
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Hiding in the corner to stare at a penis when you are a teenager =

Curious about your sexuality.

Whereas, hiding in the corner to stare at a penis where you are an adult =

Gay or bisexual.
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:19 AM   [Ignore Me] #82
AztecWarrior
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"Curious about your sexuality"

WTF?
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The gun katas. Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Cleric has determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The gun kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, your firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increase to lethal proficiency makes the master of the gun katas an adversary not to be taken lightly.
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:22 AM   [Ignore Me] #83
Firefly
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Originally Posted by AztecWarrior
Locker Room- "Oh shit, that guy was nude."

= Not gay.
Borderline homophobe, unless you're some silly little dumbass who gets excited by skin in general, like "Oh shit, a girl in a bikini!" or "Oh shit, two dogs fucking!"

Originally Posted by AztecWarrior
Locker Room- hiding in the corner to stare at penis-

= gay.
That's not necessarily gay either. But I'd definitely be suspicious, and probably turn around and say "Here, get a good luck, dumbass."

Now, if the guy was jerking off, then that would probably be gay. But who the fuck cares?
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:23 AM   [Ignore Me] #84
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Originally Posted by Firefly
Borderline homophobe, unless you're some silly little dumbass who gets excited by skin in general, like "Oh shit, a girl in a bikini!" or "Oh shit, two dogs fucking!"
Thanks, asshole.

I've wandered into locker rooms and some guy's in the nude. I just ignore it and proceed with whatever I have to do, be it change, urinate, etc.

Though I do change in a cubicle.
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The gun katas. Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Cleric has determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The gun kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, your firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increase to lethal proficiency makes the master of the gun katas an adversary not to be taken lightly.
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:26 AM   [Ignore Me] #85
Octavian
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AW, Google it.

Changing in a cubicle? I thought I was the only one. It's not that I'm a homophobe, I just feel insecure about my body and don't like changing with other guys.
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:34 AM   [Ignore Me] #86
Infernus
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No comment on changing in locker rooms... I naturally stare at the 'hot' guys in the locker room.

I for one am very insecure about my body though... because I'm fat, and scarred...
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Old 2004-11-28, 01:35 AM   [Ignore Me] #87
Firefly
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Originally Posted by AztecWarrior
Thanks, asshole.
I'm sure Jesus approves of your language.

My comment was not directed at you, so don't get your panties in a wad. Take your manziere and go wash it, Sally.
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Old 2004-11-28, 03:40 AM   [Ignore Me] #88
Breed
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Originally Posted by -Hezzy-
2 inches.

OFF THE FLOOR.
yeah right, maybe when you lie on your belly :P
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Old 2004-11-28, 09:24 AM   [Ignore Me] #89
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So interesting story, semi-related to the original intent of this thread.

I also have to add, no more flaming or I will beat you all with an aluminium baseball bat. Even you Firefly, but it'd be one of those GI Joe fake ones.

Okay so here's my story.

This weekend, my sister, her boyfriend and their cat came to visit. The cat's a pretty weird looking thing, doesn't really look like a proper Domestic Shorthair at all on account of the fact that it has a really dense coat, a stubby tail, and small, squat ears. The cat's name was "Henry".

So Thanksgiving day rolls around and someone says, "How do you know Henry is a boy cat?" and my sister, Patty, says "He has balls."

So me, being the one most eager to make my sister look stupid, pick the cat up and lift up it's tail.

And what do I see?

Well, I'll tell you what I don't see. I don't see a little furry pouch o' nuts.

I do however get a glimpse of the cat's bumhole, and then about a centimeter under that, there - as clear as day - is another hole.

So after we revealed the truth about "Henry's" gender, my sister spent the next 2 hours in denial and laughing her ass off.

The cat's name is now Hillary and we bought her a nice pink collar last night for good measure.

That is all.

No more flames.
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Old 2004-11-28, 09:38 AM   [Ignore Me] #90
Hezzy
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RIP Penis thread November 2004

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