Mandatory Introduction

[Lord Surtr]

Commence Mandatory Introduction
Loading: Introduction Protocol #204

Hello ['your name here'],

My name is ['my name here']. How you you? I am well.

Things have been going well ['on the farm','at the office','in the city','in prison']. I hope I am able to ['harvest all them crops','meet all of my deadlines','strangle a hobo for rent','maintain a low sphinctoral diameter'].

Please continue to care for my ['promiscuous sister','carnival goldfish','fancy hat','promiscuous dog']. Your assistance is much appreciated.

Your reward of ['10,000 fake ruppees','a grandfather clock','fancy hat','promiscuous dog'] will be delivered shortly.

This chat has been fun.

Mission accomplished.