I'm Bored, again, He's a few jokes

[Flammey]

A blonde girl enters a store that sells curtains. She tells the
salesman I would like to buy a pink curtain in the size of my computer screen".
The surprised salesman replies, "But, madam, computers do not have curtains"!!!....
And the blonde said, "Helloooo.... I've got Windows"

---------------------------------------

A blonde, wanting to earn some money, decided to hire herself out as a handy-woman and started canvassing a nearby well-to-do neighborhood. She went to the front door of the first house, and asked the owner if he had any odd jobs for her to do.
"Well, you can paint my porch," he said, "How much will you charge me?"
The blonde, after looking about, responded, "How about $50?" The man agreed and told her that the paint and other materials that she might need were in the garage. The man's wife, inside the house, heard the conversation and said to her husband, "Does she realize that the porch goes all the way around the house?"
The man replied, "She should; she was standing on it. Do you think she's dumb?"
"No. I guess I'm guilty of being influenced by all the dumb blonde joke emails we've been receiving."
A short time later, the blonde came to the door to collect her money.
"You're finished already?" the husband asked.
"Yes," the blonde replied, "and I had paint left over, so I
gave it two coats."
Impressed, the man reached into his pocket for the $50.00 and handed it to her.
"And by the way," the blonde added, "it's not a Porch, it's a Lexus."

--------------------------------------------------

Two Guys in a Supermarket

Two guys are moving about in a supermarket when their carts collide.
One says to the other, "Excuse me, but I'm looking for my wife."
"What a coincidence, so am I, and I'm getting a little desperate."
"Well, maybe I can help you. What does your wife look like?"
"She's tall, with dark hair, long legs, firm tits, and a tight ass. What's your wife look like?"
"Never mind, let's look for yours!"