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2003-01-24, 07:08 PM
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[Ignore Me] #1 | ||
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Contributor Major General
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Post away.
Bonus for bredvity Ex. They are weak, lazy, smelly, ignorant, snobbish, weak kneed, worthless pos's.
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You First. No more Pearl Harbors. Vist www.bohicagaming.com because we're better than you. Apply|Contact|Forum |
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2003-01-24, 07:21 PM
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[Ignore Me] #3 | ||
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Contributor Major General
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Jokes.
What do you call 100,000 Frenchmen with their hands up? The Army. Q:How do you castrate a frenchmen??? A:Kick his sister in the jaw. Y do frenchmen always were yellow tyes ? A: to match the teeth Whats the best place to hide your money ? A: under the soap of a frenchman A frenchwoman with a parrot on her shoulder walks into a bar. the barman says "Thats an real ugle bird u got there. Where did u get it? The parrot says " i got it in France ..theres millions of em there" What did the Mayor of Paris say to the German Army as they entered during WWII? "Table for One Hundred Thousand?". Q-how can you tell if a frechmen has been in your backyard? A-your garbage is gone and your dog is pregnant! Why don't they have fireworks at Euro Disney? Because every time they shoot them off, the French try to surrender. Q. What do you do if you see 90,000,000 dead french-men? A. Stop laughing and re-load!! Q: How do you stop a French tank? A: Shoot the guy that's pushing it! Q: What do you call 20 dead frenchmen in the back of a lorry. A: A good days hunting Three guys, an Englishman, a Frenchman and an American are out walking along the beach together one day. They come across a lantern and a genie pops out of it. "I will give you each one wish, " says the genie. The American says, "I am a farmer, my dad was a farmer, and my son will also farm. I want the land to be forever fertile in America." With a blink of the genie's eye, 'FOOM' - the land in America was forever made fertile for farming. The Frenchman was amazed, so he said, "I want a wall around France, so that no one can come into our precious country." Again, with a blink of the Genie's eye, 'POOF' - there was a huge wall around France. The Englishman asks, "I'm very curious. Please tell me more about this wall. The Genie explains, "Well, it's about 150 feet high, 50 feet thick and nothing can get in or out." The Englishman says, "Fill it up with water." Q: What do you do if you drive over a French man? A: REVERSE! Q: What do you do if you see a French man drowing? A: Chuck his wife and kids in aswell. Did you hear about the Frenchman who lost his licence to practice medicin? He was caught having sex with some of his patients. It's a shame, he was by far the best vet in town. What do you get if you see a Frenchman up to his neck in sand? More sand. Why do French men have moustashes? A: To remind them of their mothers. Q: How long does it take a french woman to have a poo? A: 9 months The French zoo had acquired a very rare species of gorilla. Within a few weeks, the female gorilla became very cranky and difficult to handle. Upon examination, the zoo veterinarian determined the problem. The gorilla was in heat. To make matters worse, there were no male gorilla species available. While reflecting on their problem, the zoo administrators noticed Pierre, an employee responsible for cleaning the animals' cages. Pierre, it was rumoured, had the ability to satisfy any female, but he wasn't very bright. So the zoo administrators thought they might have a solution. Pierre was approached with a proposition: would he be willing to have sex with the gorilla for five hundred Francs? Pierre showed some interest, but said he would have to think the matter over carefully. The following day, Pierre announced that he would accept their offer, but only under three conditions. "First," he said, "I don't want to have to kiss her. Secondly, I want nothing to do with any offspring that may result from this union." The zoo administration quickly agreed to these conditions, so they asked what about the third condition. "Well," said Pierre, "you've gotta give me another week to come up with the five hundred Francs." A psychology professor decided to study the way in which different people from different parts of Europe have sex with sheep. He traveled first to Wales, where he asks a farmer to explain his method: "Well, boyo, I put her back legs down my nice green wellies, grab her with me velcro gloves, and we're well away. Tidy!" The professor tries Scotland next "Hoots an' toots man, I put her back legs down my nice green wellies, grab her with me velcro gloves, and we're well away. Och aye tha noo!" The professor moves on to Germany: "Well, I find the most efficient way is to grab her with my velcro gloves, and we're well away. The professor is noticing a pattern developing, so he decides to try France, and then end his investigation. He stops a bloke by the Eiffel tower named Pierre, and asks him to explain the French method: "Well monsieur, I put her back legs down my nice green wellies, sling her front legs over me shoulders, and that's all there is to it!" The professor is excited to have found some national variation and tells Pierre that this is different to the methods of the Scots, Welsh and Germans. "How do they do it then?" asks Pierre, and the professor explains. Pierre on hearing the explanation walks of disgusted. "What! No kissing?" A FRENCHMAN named Pierre was walking through the small town he lived in with a friend. He pointed to a row of houses and says, "You see those houses? I built those houses! But do they call me Pierre the Housebuilder..No" They walked along a bit futher, and he points to a number of boats in the harbour. "You see those boats ? I built those boats! But do they call me Pierre the Boat Builder? NO!" Then he turns to his friend and says "BUT MAKE LOVE TO JUST ONE GOAT AND YOU ARE LABELED FOR LIFE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" There was a Frenchman, an Englishman and Claudia Schiffer sitting together in a carriage in a train going through Provence. Suddenly the train went through a tunnel and as it was an old style train, there were no lights in the carriages and it went completely dark. Then there was a kissing noise and the sound of a really loud slap. When the train came out of the tunnel, Claudia Schiffer and the Englishman were sitting as if nothing had happened and the Frenchman had his hand against his face as if he had been slapped there. The Frenchman was thinking: 'The English fella must have kissed Claudia Schiffer and she missed him and slapped me instead.' Claudia Schiffer was thinking: 'The French fella must have tried to kiss me and actually kissed the Englishman and got slapped for it.' And the Englishman was thinking: 'This is great. The next time the train goes through a tunnel I'll make another kissing noise and slap that French bastard again.' Q. What's the difference between a Frenchwoman and a werewolf? A. The Frenchwoman is not quite as hairy but the werewolf smells better. Q. Why did the French plant trees along the Champs Elysees? A. So the Germans could march in the shade. Q. Hear about the library that burnt down in Paris? A. Destroyed their entire collection and they hadn't even finished colouring in the second one ! Q. What do you call a Frenchman with a sheep under one arm and a goat under the other? A. bisexual. I stole these.
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You First. No more Pearl Harbors. Vist www.bohicagaming.com because we're better than you. Apply|Contact|Forum |
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2003-01-24, 07:44 PM
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[Ignore Me] #4 | ||
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Lieutenant Colonel
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This is from the "50 Reasons why the Lord of the Rings Sucks" page:
The mutated muscular soldiers of Mordor turned out to be hilariously ineffective soldiers, a dozen of them held off by a single dying human. Apparently they made the beasts by crossing Orcs, Goblins and the French.
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If you hear a voice within you saying, 'You are not a painter,' then by all means paint boy, and that voice will be silenced. ~ Vincent van Gogh Sit Back, Relax, and Enjoy the Action. |
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2003-01-24, 10:02 PM
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[Ignore Me] #11 | |||
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Contributor Lieutenant Colonel
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2003-01-25, 12:12 AM
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[Ignore Me] #15 | |||
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Lieutenant General
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They don't.
Well at least IMO. No one culture or ethnic group suck as a whole but rather bad people create flase impressions and prejudice...but don't mind me i'm just a foolish optimistic. 
 (or force it on those who don't want it, same difference)  dammit! !!!
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