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2003-10-31, 08:32 PM | [Ignore Me] #1 | ||
Second Lieutenant
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Chapter 1.3
Jimbob was a terran soldier. Everyday he got up and made his bed like a good little boy. "Jim don't you not like making you bed everyday?" said Fredjoe, another terran dude. "I"M LOVIN IT!!!!1111" said Jimbob. Fredjoe had a seizure and writhed on the floor. Jimbob stole his bran flakes and ate them, but then he was constipated. "GET IN THE SUNDERER YOU PANSIES!!!1111!!" said SergeantSCREAM. Hans was confused. "Why is everyone shouting with too many exclamation marks and ones?" Jimbob threw his bran flakes at him, and Hans had a seizure. "GET IN!!!11!!!" said SCREAM. Jimbob ran through the side of the sunderer and punched a hole in it and then sat in a velvet seat with a coffee stain on it. The driver had an eyepatch on and a parrot. He yelled, "ARR!! IM A PIRATE MONLKEY!!!11!" Hans got up from his seizure. He was confused again. "Vhat is going on? Vhy did I have de seizure. And vhy do you not spell the monkey correctly?" The driver floored it and the sunderer drove away. Hans fell out of the hole in the door and had another seizure. Jimbob laughed like a school girl and ate more branflakes. END CHAPTER 1.3 CUE THE DANCING MONKEYS |
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2003-10-31, 10:00 PM | [Ignore Me] #3 | ||
First Lieutenant
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[Post removed by Admin]
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War doesn't determine who's right, just who's left - Bertrand Russel "The absence of war is not peace." - Harry S. Truman Qui desiderat pacem pr�paret bellum. - He who would desire peace should be prepared for war. When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you - Unknown Last edited by VashTheStamped; 2003-10-31 at 11:22 PM. Reason: Filter_01 |
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2003-11-01, 12:07 PM | [Ignore Me] #6 | ||
First Lieutenant
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awww. wat was wrong with it???
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War doesn't determine who's right, just who's left - Bertrand Russel "The absence of war is not peace." - Harry S. Truman Qui desiderat pacem pr�paret bellum. - He who would desire peace should be prepared for war. When there is no enemy within, the enemies outside cannot hurt you - Unknown |
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2003-11-01, 05:49 PM | [Ignore Me] #8 | ||
Second Lieutenant
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Chapter 2 and a quarter
Hans got up from his seizure again. "Vhy do I keep have dese seizures?" Jimbob stuck his face out of the hole in the sunderer and yelled at Hans, "I'M LOVIN ITTT!!!" The pirate driver guy said arrrrr and floored the pedal. They were headed straight for Wal-mart! "NoooO! Don't hit teh wal-mart!" At the last minute, the driver had a seizure!!1 The sunderer stopped and Jimbob got out before it took off again. He decided to buy some guns at walmart. He went into walmart and looked for a good gun. An old lady tried to karate chop him so he yelled at her and gave her a heart attack. A guy in a big red vest came up to him. He was smiling insanely. "BUY SOMETHING FROM WALMARt, YES?" "YES!!" said Jimbob. The guy showed him some guns. He picked up a Gauze Rifle, it wrapped the guy in the vest in gauze. The red vest dude yelled something but jimbob couldn't understand. Jimbob tried out a cycler and decided to buy it. He went up to another person in a giant red vest standing by a cash register. "I wanna buy this, how much is it, N00blar?" The cashier had a huge smile, "it's 500 NUTs." Jimbob pulled an ant out of his pocket, the bug not the truck. He smashed on the cash register and NUTs came out. "everyone knows ANTs have NUTs in them." Jimbob took his new cycler and went to the HART. He dropped down onto Ishundar. Another terran, Joefred, came up to him. "Hi, I'm Joefred." Jimbob had a seizure and began firing randomly. He hit Joefred and killed him. A giant red thing popped up. He shot that too. He saw a guy eating lucky charms. The guy yelled "THEYRE MAGICALLY DELICIOUS!!!!" Then the guy had a seizure, so Jimbob ran away. END CHAPTER 2 AND 1/4 Bring in drooling morons. |
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2003-11-01, 09:34 PM | [Ignore Me] #10 | ||
Lightbulb Collector
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Eh?
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The gun katas. Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Cleric has determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The gun kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, your firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increase to lethal proficiency makes the master of the gun katas an adversary not to be taken lightly. |
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2003-11-03, 04:05 PM | [Ignore Me] #11 | ||
Corporal
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You took my seizures! Grrr......
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The world is grey, the mountains old, The forge's fire is ashen-cold; No harp is wrung, no hammer falls: The darkness dwells in Durin's halls; The shadow lies upon his tomb In Moria, in Khazad-d�m. But still the sunken stars appear In dark and windless Mirrormere; There lies his crown in water deep, Till Durin wakes again from sleep. -=< The Lone Boar >=- |
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2003-11-03, 04:48 PM | [Ignore Me] #12 | ||||
Major
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------------------------------------------------------ searo-FAQ:
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2003-11-03, 05:02 PM | [Ignore Me] #13 | ||
Corporal
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srry...
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The world is grey, the mountains old, The forge's fire is ashen-cold; No harp is wrung, no hammer falls: The darkness dwells in Durin's halls; The shadow lies upon his tomb In Moria, in Khazad-d�m. But still the sunken stars appear In dark and windless Mirrormere; There lies his crown in water deep, Till Durin wakes again from sleep. -=< The Lone Boar >=- |
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2003-11-03, 05:21 PM | [Ignore Me] #15 | ||
Corporal
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(I'm too stupid to figure out how to do quotes)
Originally quoted by VashTheStamped: though i'd like to call this flamming...i'm on your side.
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The world is grey, the mountains old, The forge's fire is ashen-cold; No harp is wrung, no hammer falls: The darkness dwells in Durin's halls; The shadow lies upon his tomb In Moria, in Khazad-d�m. But still the sunken stars appear In dark and windless Mirrormere; There lies his crown in water deep, Till Durin wakes again from sleep. -=< The Lone Boar >=- |
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