What would you do? - Page 2

SilverLord · 2004-02-27, 11:31 AM

Lend him the money but make him get a job and make him work to pay you the money back and gain some god damn responsibility.

Madcow · 2004-02-27, 11:33 AM

Originally Posted by SilverLord

Lend him the money but make him get a job and make him work to pay you the money back and gain some god damn responsibility.

It's his friend, not his kid.

SilverLord · 2004-02-27, 11:35 AM

But you have to get him to be responsible, it's for his own good.

He can't go out of high school expecting friend loans.

Madcow · 2004-02-27, 11:54 AM

Originally Posted by SilverLord

But you have to get him to be responsible, it's for his own good.

He can't go out of high school expecting friend loans.

You have to get him to be responsible? He's a friend, it's not your job to make him anything. It's your job to be a friend, nothing more. The idea that his friends are responsible for raising him is absurd.

Give him the money. If it doesn't come back, you aren't disappointed. If it does come back, you're pleasantly surprised. More importantly, you're a true friend. It's only freaking money.

Everay · 2004-02-27, 12:58 PM

well, my brother is the same way, he gets too many expenses, so he cant pay back his loans to people like me, or my mother, he owes me not only 30 bucks, but a computer monitor of mine he sold without me giving the okay, or without me knowing, or getting any money from it. he knows no resposibility, and we give him too many chances, and when we do say no, he acts as if he has never done wrong, and when we do, he acts as if were saints, and then in the end he treats us like shit. let that "freind" of your learn resonsibilty, noone ever wants the phrase "with freinds like these who needs enemies" be true for them.

EarlyDawn · 2004-02-27, 02:30 PM

Give him the money. If he pays you back eventually, you've hopefully taught him a lesson about borrowing money. If he dosen't, you've made a wise investment on seeing who's a real friend.

BIGTROJANMAN · 2004-02-27, 02:52 PM

let your friend get his ass beat for about 2 min. then tell the loan shark to stop pay him, then talk to your friend about his problem then when your friend thinks its cool kick his ass or do it the other way around kick his ass then tell him about the problem hes got an not to do it again because you wont be there for him next time.

Infernus · 2004-02-27, 03:04 PM

... I would let him get his ass beat... it ur money and u have goood uses for it...

Red October · 2004-02-27, 03:04 PM

Tough call. I guess it really depends on the situation. If he's just in a slump, such as inbetween jobs or just go laid off and is having trouble finding work, I'd say pay off the sharkie and giver your "friend" some verbal abuse. Let him know that your upset and that he owes you big time. If he's your friend, he'll make it up somehow someway. If he isn't, then he won't and just walk away.

But if he's consistently into this kind of trouble, let him get beat. Especially since your only at the High School level. Otherwise, he'll always think that someone will always come to his rescue. Furthermore, he'll treat you like a leech for as long as you are "friends". High school friends can dissappear over time, but if he see's you as some kind of cash cow...he won't ever dissappear. Best he learns his lesson now, rather than later where it could be much worse. Example, my mother-in-law! My wife (before we met) would come home with her paycheck and my mother-in-law would take it. Claiming need for bills and such, which is understandable, they were poor and I've been at that point too. But when I met my wife and started getting serious, her mom tried to end the relationship (probally fearing the loss of income). Later I learned that my wife wasn't just her only source of income. She was getting alimony from her seperated husband, relatives, etc. She was getting quite a bit. When she asked for money from me and my parents, we gave. But, that didn't stop there, she kept asking. Of course we said no (didn't have much ourselves) but I found out from other relatives that she just keeps asking and the amounts keep getting bigger. She can never hold a job for long (I wonder if its on purpose) with her violent temper. She is so used to hand-outs, that...well...I think you get the picture. Every letter we get from her is about how she's about to lose the apartment, car, etc. Yet she manages to keep going. Her husband (my father in law) didn't want to seperate, she more or less (along with a sister she should have never listened to) pushed/forced him out. When she really is down and out, she's going to have to learn to swallow her pride (which will be a first, cuz its everyone else's fault in her eyes) and learn to live with her husband (who is willing to take her back). Ok , I rambled on enough.

Madcow · 2004-02-27, 03:04 PM

Originally Posted by BIGTROJANMAN

let your friend get his ass beat for about 2 min. then tell the loan shark to stop pay him, then talk to your friend about his problem then when your friend thinks its cool kick his ass or do it the other way around kick his ass then tell him about the problem hes got an not to do it again because you wont be there for him next time.

People have very different definitions of 'friend' than I have. To be perfectly honest, I'm pretty happy to not be friends with a number of you.

Triggar · 2004-02-27, 03:09 PM

Where are the debtor's parents, just out of curiosity?

I know if it was between me borrowing from Peter to pay Paul (as the saying goes) and getting my ass kicked, my mom would probably slide a few $10's my way in exchange for me being an angel (and being her slave) for that many weeks.

BIGTROJANMAN · 2004-02-27, 03:11 PM

Originally Posted by Madcow

People have very different definitions of 'friend' than I have. To be perfectly honest, I'm pretty happy to not be friends with a number of you.

Well I see what you mean,but some times friends have to learn a lesson. even if it means they have consequences. thats just my opinion its not like hes going to do what any of us says he wil know what to do when the time comes.

Kikinchikin · 2004-02-27, 03:23 PM

dont pay the money. It's important for him to learn his lesson now (in a setting where the worst that will happen is he gets punched a few times) rather than get into serious trouble later in life with someone willing to really harm him.

EarlyDawn · 2004-02-27, 03:37 PM

Originally Posted by Lilbird2431

dont pay the money. It's important for him to learn his lesson now (in a setting where the worst that will happen is he gets punched a few times) rather than get into serious trouble later in life with someone willing to really harm him.

I maintain my position, but this is a good point.

Madcow · 2004-02-27, 03:40 PM

Originally Posted by BIGTROJANMAN

Well I see what you mean,but some times friends have to learn a lesson. even if it means they have consequences. thats just my opinion its not like hes going to do what any of us says he wil know what to do when the time comes.

My point is that as a friend, teaching them a 'lesson' isn't your job. At all. Even a little bit. You're either there as a friend, or you're not. If you can't swing the $45, decision made and cheapo is on his own. If you can swing the $45 then your choice is whether or not the guy is truly a friend. If you're worried he's taking advantage of you, he's not a friend. If you're not worried he's taking advantage of you, you've answered your own question.

Give him the money.