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PSU: Drive like you stole it!
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PSU Social
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2003-02-25, 11:09 PM
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[Ignore Me] #17 | ||
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Lightbulb Collector
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Those **** log on when we are asleep, use the tools from their Chinese cousins, and hack PS so that the NC lose.
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The gun katas. Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Cleric has determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The gun kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, your firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increase to lethal proficiency makes the master of the gun katas an adversary not to be taken lightly. |
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2003-02-25, 11:20 PM
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[Ignore Me] #19 | ||
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Private
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Dear Soldiers.....
Yes.....I am still alive. Although I wish I were dead. I await the morning sunrise in horror. My division has been destroyed. It is important that someone survives to tell others what happened at Eureka post. The New Conglomerate now has no respawn points on this continent. My health is very low. Some time after midnight the Vanu Sovereignty sent us a message. It played over all radio frequencies. It played over and over. The message was an announcement that the Terran Republic and the Vanu Sovereignty had joined forces. It also said that the New Conglomerate had collapsed and that our troops were all that remained. It really wasn't so hard to believe. That night with a storm rolling in and under the cover of darkness we mounted a strike force. I piloted a Galaxy heavy transport with 6 men on board. Our objective was to capture their spawning tower and remove the possibility for the Vanu to get reinforcements. We threw everything we had into the strike force including all our vanguard Medium tanks and Mosquito light aircraft. I really don't know what happened. It all happened so quick. The galaxy got hit and spun wildly out of control. I tried to set it down easily but it went down killing half the people on board. The rest were killed by vehicle mounted lasers as we ran from the crash site. I don't remember how I got here. The sun is rising now and I must get going. Perhaps if I can walk to a far shore I can activate a remote tower. If I do that perhaps we can spawn more New Conglomerate troops to stage a counterattack. That is if there are any troops left to spawn..... Mcshlong Captain New Conglomerate ex-4th infantry Division ex- Eureka Post Last edited by mcshlong; 2003-02-25 at 11:29 PM. |
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2003-02-25, 11:24 PM
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[Ignore Me] #20 | ||
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First Sergeant
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 its so stupid it's hilarious!  Although, it does sound like something you would read out of a WWII vet's journal, and if it weren't in this funny enviornment, it might be depressing... It' so funny though!!!
Last edited by Nightmare; 2003-02-25 at 11:26 PM. |
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2003-02-25, 11:28 PM
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[Ignore Me] #21 | ||
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Lightbulb Collector
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Can I join in? I'd like to post a story.
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The gun katas. Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Cleric has determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The gun kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, your firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increase to lethal proficiency makes the master of the gun katas an adversary not to be taken lightly. |
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2003-02-25, 11:38 PM
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[Ignore Me] #23 | ||
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Sig Mastah!
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Dear McShlong: [STOP]
Am writing by telegraph because all comm channels busy DLing pr0n. [STOP] Things are fine back at Sanctuary. [STOP] Weather is great.[STOP] Your sister sends her love. [STOP] Your recent letters seem troubled. [STOP] Maybe you should stop hanging out in the VS Sanctuary. [STOP] Your friend.[STOP] Airlift.  
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[ Been a while, desu ne? ] |
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2003-02-25, 11:58 PM
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[Ignore Me] #24 | ||
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Lightbulb Collector
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Dear Soldiers...
I hope that you can recieve this voice message before it gets confiscated. We just lost the continent. We took heavy artillery fire from the north, destroying some Galaxies that were taking off with some of my best friends. We knew our contingency plans well. My job was to hold off armored vehicles incoming to base. The job was impossible. Literally dozens and dozens of MAG-Riders rolled by with only a handful of our Reavers to stop them. It gets worse. Eventually we ran out of power. ANTs had not been coming for a full week now. We had been doing a pretty good job of conserving energy. But not good enough. People began to flee on foot. The remainder of my division escorted the sea of people. I, however got to go ahead to escort the remaining Galaxies due to my extraordinary AA skill. Most of our troops had the liberty of finding out of the Vanu-Terran alliance over AGN. I found out the hard way. We ran into a convoy of MAG-Riders en route to our base. They started firing upwards. Ship after ship fireballed and fell down. Any survivors of the crashes were sentenced to a blast by the main gun. People I knew were literally having holes cut in them for their entrails to fall out and bounce off the ground. I proceeded to engage the tanks. My first volley of rockets managed to hit a MAG-Rider in the back, resulting in a tremendous energy burst as its energy capsules exploded, converting the tank into a lightning rod. This is where I learned of the alliance. I swear, at least a hundred Terran mosquitoes came from out of NOWHERE and decimated the remaining ships. With my Reaver ninety degrees to the attackers, I was screwed. Some lucky bastard nearly emptied the damn belt into my Reaver. Smoke filled the cockpit. I was getting burned! I opened the cockpit, jumped out, and prayed as the kinetic dampeners carried me down. I turned around. Our ships were crashing left and right. They were being cut through like a knife through butter due to sheer numbers. We fought hard. But when one of our pilots got behind one of theirs, there were two on our pilot and three on the Galaxy he had left behind to engage. Eventually I smacked a tree on my way down. It's a good thing my visor was down. This must have jolted my smoke-damaged kinetic dampener, as it failed then and there, fifteen feet above ground. I broke my right leg and arm coming down. I was badly burned in my upper body. There was no time to rest. Already, Vanu hovercraft were scurrying around looking for suvivors to run over. I dove into a river, the only blue thing around. Eventually, I managed to make it into this cave. According to my GPS, I am thirty clicks from the crash site and nowhere near a SAR team. I've thought about ending it. All I have to do is put the Suppessor to my head and squeeze the trigger. I have run out of medical supplies. I have managed to kill a TR squad of three scouts. That changed my mind about ending it. I am here to win this war, and I will fight to the death for the cause! 
__________________
The gun katas. Through analysis of thousands of recorded gunfights, the Cleric has determined that the geometric distribution of antagonists in any gun battle is a statistically predictable element. The gun kata treats the gun as a total weapon, each fluid position representing a maximum kill zone, inflicting maximum damage on the maximum number of opponents while keeping the defender clear of the statistically traditional trajectories of return fire. By the rote mastery of this art, your firing efficiency will rise by no less than 120%. The difference of a 63% increase to lethal proficiency makes the master of the gun katas an adversary not to be taken lightly. |
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2003-02-26, 05:16 AM
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[Ignore Me] #27 | ||
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Contributor First Lieutenant
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Great story, just one problem, the NC kicks arse so its not really a farewell, but an awakening to get your stinking no good hides outside and kick Vanooooooooo butt!
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Smoke me a kipper, skipper... I'll be back for breakfast 
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