What would NEVER happen on Star Trek(any series)

Revolution · 2003-04-19, 07:27 AM

Q: What would not happen on Star Trek(ANY SERIES)

They would bring along a spare set of Dilithium Crystals

Wesey gets a spanking.

Worf actually takes a passive viewpoint.

Riker actually decides whether or not to keep facial hair.

Picard asks the replicator for a shot of Jose Cuervo instead of Earl Grey.

Guinan doesn't wear a silly hat.

Data finally gets a promotion after doing everyone else's job for years.

The Enterprise comes upon a planet they've been to before and Picards says 'Not here again, this place sucks.'

Picard wears a toupee.

Picard is late for his duty shift, comes to the bridge in a bathrobe.

Worf Takes up ballet.

Data speaks in a southern accent. 'I am working alright, ya'll."

Geordi comes out with a gangsta rap CD titled: "Blind Man's Bluff, Yo."

Data sings the "Lifeforms" song in fromt of the UFP President.

Piker wears a cowboy hat to the bridge.

Picard orders a Red Alert and the computer responds, "Up yours'.

Barkley has a real relationship with someone who isn't a hologram.

Geordi LaForge and Harry Kim find girlfriends.

Chakotay reveals that his tattoo is really eyeliner.

Dr. Crusher uses medicine other than Anaprovaline.

Seven of Nine loosens up and has a torrid love affair with Neelix.

Rom goes postal and beats the living crap out of Quark.

Quark finally admits: " I don't do this for the money....I just love entertaining people."

Quark admits to running a prostitution ring and he's the Dabo girls' pimp.

You see the REAL programs that the single men run in the holodeck! With the funky music and everything!

The Original crew finally admit they are all drug addicts(Spock psycadelics, Bones Drunk, Capt Kirk Esxtacy, Scotty Speedfreak, OHura Pill popper, Checkoff and Sulu are coked out gay lovers)

Geordy would change his name to G-Pac, and him and Tuvak would make a musical group as a tribute to a 20th Century Rapper.

Q actually helps the crew out in a nice way, then Spontaniously Combusts never to be seen again.

Bilana admits to being a Freak in bed and invites Neelix in on a 3 some while the Holographic Doctor watches while wearing a leather mask and using a whip.

Neelix is thrown in the brig for molestation/sagitory rape with his 3 year old girlfriend

Someone who's only called Crewman, or Ensin, actually saves the day