A joke.. (nothing special)

Mtx · 2002-11-10, 01:08 AM

Once upon a time, a perfect man and a perfect woman met. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve, this perfect couple were driving their perfect car ( a Grand Caravan) along a winding road, when they noticed someone at the side of the road in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped to help. There stood Santa Claus with a huge bundle of toys. Not wanting to disappoint any children on the eve of Christmas, the perfect couple loaded Santa and his toys into their vehicle. Soon they were driving along delivering the toys.
Unfortunately, the driving conditions deteriorated and the perfect couple and Santa Claus had an accident. Only one of them survived the accident.
Who was the survivor?

(Scroll down for the answer.)
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The perfect woman survived.
She's the only one who really existed in the first place. Everyone knows there is no Santa Claus and there is no such thing as a perfect man.

****Women: Stop reading here, that is the end of the joke for you.
****Men: Keep scrolling
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So, if there is no perfect man and no Santa Claus, the perfect woman must have been driving.
This explains why there was a car accident in the first place. By the way, if you're a woman and you're reading this, this illustrates another point: Women never listen either. You were told to stop scrolling.

crash125k · 2002-11-10, 01:34 AM

thats great

Enkidu · 2002-11-10, 02:11 AM

Hamma · 2002-11-10, 02:36 AM

jamikey · 2002-11-10, 04:39 AM

thats a real knee slapper

DJsoixante · 2002-11-10, 04:52 AM

w00tage at it's best.

DJ.

jamikey · 2002-11-10, 06:13 AM

SHITAGE at its best..LOL

Shiver · 2002-11-10, 09:01 AM

Hilger · 2002-11-10, 12:21 PM

kthxdrvthru

Mtx · 2002-11-10, 02:31 PM

Originally posted by Hilger
kthxdrvthru

How about these then.

Mother-in-law !!

George went on a vacation to the Middle East with most of his family including his mother-in-law. During their vacation and while they were visiting Jerusalem. George's mother-in-law died. With the death certificate in hand, George went to the American Consulate Office to make arrangements to send the body back to the States for proper burial. The Consul, after hearing of the death of the mother-in-law told George that the sending of a body back to the States for burial is very, very expensive. It could cost as much as $5,000.00. The Consul continues, in most cases the person responsible for the remains normally decides to bury the body here. This would only cost $150.00. George thinks for some time and answers, "I don't care how much it will cost to send the body back; that's what I want to do." The Consul, after hearing this, says "You must have loved your mother-in-law very much considering the difference in price." "No, it's not that," says George. "You see, I know of a case many years ago of a person
that was buried here in Jerusalem. On the third day he arose from the dead! I just can't take that chance.

The United Airline's passenger cabin was being served by an obviously gay flight attendant who seemed to put everyone into a good mood as he served them food and drinks. As the plane prepared to descend, he came swishing down the aisle in 1st Class and announced to the passengers, "Captain Marvey has asked me to announce that he'll be landing the big scary plane shortly, lovely people, so if you could just put up your trays that would be super." On his trip back up the aisle he noticed that a well dressed rather exotic looking middle eastern woman hadn't moved a muscle. "Perhaps you didn't hear me over those big brute engines. I asked you to raise your trazy-poo so the main man can pitty-pat us to the ground." She calmly turned her head and said, "In my country I am called a princess. I take orders from no one." To which the flight attendant replied without missing a beat, "Well sweet-cheeks, in my country I'm called a Queen so I outrank you. Put the tray up, Bitch."